I also find it very strange when black people use the "N" word between each other without being offended, but get totally crazy when somebody else uses it.
This is a concept that many disagree with, even in the black community. And I can't speak for everyone, but this is my feeling on it:
It isn't really possible to convey what it feels like for someone to look you in the eye and call you the N word with contempt. It's like...it's like if someone just walked up to you and your wife, and just started kissing her in front of you. In my experience, my first reaction isn't even anger...it's more of a sick feeling in the stomach, a split second when you question whether maybe that guy is right. Maybe I am less than a person, not worth the respect that you'd give even your pet dog. Then, reality hits and that sick feeling turns into anger and the desire to take that hurt feeling from yourself and inflict it on the opposing person.
I've been lucky. In my lifetime there have generally been avenues with which I could defend myself in such situations, and such situations have been few and far between. But in my dad's life? For someone to not only be able to TELL you with sincerity that you are worthless, but then to also have the means to enforce that with your very life if you choose to disagree with them. People, especially young people, forget just how bad it was to be black in America just a generation ago. So take all of the pain and anguish of a people and condense it down to one word, and for many blacks that is what it is like for someone of another race to use the N word.
But it feels TERRIBLE for one measly word to have that kind of power over you. So, what do you do to take the power out of that word? For many, they decided to own it. The logic is that if I use the N word all of the time, it loses a bit of power each time I hear it. And if I use it to refer to friends and people that I care about, then it hurts just that much less if someone else uses it differently. You basically re-define the word, and then if anyone tries to use it to hurt you again you can tell yourself that THEY'RE the ones that are using it wrong, THEY'RE the ones that are not worthy of respect. And it makes it easier to deal.
Now, I don't think most people have really thought it out to that degree. And especially among young folks that were never called the N word in anger in their lives, and are young enough for Obama to be one of the first president's they ever knew...I don't know if they have any thought at all as to why they should or shouldn't use the N word. I personally use it without a lot of thought among my friends and family, but in recent years I find myself thinking more and more about it. But that's a whole different conversation. The point of this post was to point out that there really is some twisted, tortured logic for the "we can use it but you can't" mentality...whether you agree with it or understand it is another matter, and maybe I'm just not a good enough writer to convey it on a message board.
Topic: Did Gary Payton use the "N" word last night? (Read 12848 times)