After the first preseason ranking had the Orlando Magic as winning the Southeast division, Wizards' GM KCatthestripe had this to say:
" That's probably fair. I mean they have Tim Duncan right? AND Allen Iverson? To heck with this. Brad MILLER? Man, that's just unnecessary. I quit, we should all just go home. Pack it up, seasons over.
What? Whats that you say? It's NOT 2001? It's 2008? And Duncan is old? 32? and in the decline of his career? Iverson is 33? And is playing 2 guard? Brad Miller is NOT 32! Really? And they drafted that guy with the funny hair from Florida who shoots free throws like his daddy putting backspin on a tennis ball? And that guy who used to be from Boston that always talked out of the side of his mouth? And a guy named 'Thaddeus"? There are people who aren't civil war re-anactors named Thaddeus? Get out of town?
And you say we have Shawn Marion And Andrei Kirelenko, two of the most versitle defenders in the league? Two guys who like to get out and run? And the best two guard prospect not named "Roy"? And a young, athletic big, with good post moves, interior passing ability and averaged a block and a half in RESERVE minutes last year? Get out of town, somebody smart drafted him. And we've got a scoring point guard who can get out and lead the break and is adept at driving to the hoop and dishing out? Wait, now you're telling me we have a guy named JR, and nobody's shot him? And we have that kid from Yonkers who had the TV show? Plus a guy who scored 48 points that one time, that's pretty cool.
So I guess it is fair to say that the Orlando Magic are better than us, even though they probably keep their AARP cards in their gym lockers. Did I mention they have a guy named Thaddeus?
So I guess that's fair.
ORLANDO -- The state's AARP issued a statement today after lunacy-filled comments by KCatthestripe, GM of the Washingotn Wizards.
"We don't know if KCatthestripe realizes this or not, but AARP stands for American Association of RETIRED People. So since all of the Orlando Magics are still in the NBA, they're clearly not retired. Furthermore we're troubled that rather than extoll the virtues of their own team, KCatthestripe resorted to making fun of the Magic's core for being so-called 'old'. We have enough age discrimination to deal with without 32-year olds being called "old"."
When reached for comment about the age of his team Gainesville Celtic, the architect of the Orlando Magics, said "didn't they say that about the last team that won the NBA title? Get real folks. Talent and heart wins titles. Our team is anchored by Tim Duncan and his 4 NBA rings --- one more and you might get an NBA Title Knuckle-Sandwich fool! And his frontcourt mate, the "funny-haired" Joakim Noah oh yeah he has 2 NCAA titles."
"And show me a player hungrier for an ring in this league that Mr. Iverson. He's less than a year older than the guy who he took over that spot from, Mr. Kevin Garnett. And look at AI's numbers they're barely going down."
"Don't get me wrong, the Wiz have a nice young team, but we're building our team to win THIS YEAR. The people on Orlando and Gainesville are hungry for another winner." Before ending the call with his familiar if odd "Ubuntu, Y'all" signoff, Gainesville Celtic offered this positional breakdown.
Ivereson vs. Felton -- No contest, AI can stay with Felton and will give him fits on the defensvie end disrupting Washington's offense.
West vs. Stuckey -- Stuckey might be the Flavor of the Month, but is he really that much better than Delonte West, Randy Foye or even a newbie like Jerryd Bayless? Sure, the kid's gonna be good but C'mon. 6 games vs. the Celtics in the ECF doesn't make you a star.
Granger vs. Marion --- here's where it gets dicey for the Wiz.... Marion can't guard Duncan so he faces off versus a 24 year old, pre-Steve Nash, version of himself. Don't believ me? check it out:
http://tinyurl.com/6bkxdkDuncan vs. Kirilenko --- AK47 might be able to bother Duncan a little with his quickness, but otherwise a slaughter. Kirilenko can't create his own shot and won't get putbacks with Duncan boxing him out.
Miller vs. Blatche --- This is where Hubie Brown earns his keep. Against most teams we'll start Noah, but versus teams like WAS we'll probably throw Brad Miller against a make-believe Center like Blatche.
Topic: Celticsblog Fantasy Roster Review (Read 175511 times)