Please note, I'm not trying to offend KG or Ray fans, I'm not saying this theory is remotely accurate.
Say you're at a local watering hole getting ready to take in the NBA Finals. A fellow sidles up to the bar beside you, orders a beer, and says big game tonight, huh? You notice he's wearing some form of Celtics apparel. If you're like me, you're probably wondering if he's a true Celtics fan or as Mike Bibby's Remnants described a "Bandwagon Jumper". You could give him the Larry David look over, but I suspect this would be largely unhelpful. You need an approach that doesn't come off as a patronizing trivia question, like can you name the Celtics' 3 point guards last season? What I've come up with is a one step process that I call the PlayRyanGomes Presumption. Although it cannot provide an unassailable answer to this question, it may prove informative.
PlayRyanGomes Presumption-Step One:
1) Ask said fan who his favorite Celtic is.
If his answer is Paul Pierce, it's more likely than not he's a Celtics Die Hard. I find it hard to believe anyone who has been trudging along with this team for the last 10+ years would not cite the Captain as his/her favorite Celtic. We've gone through all the ups and downs together. We've appreciated his young playoff successes, argued that the national media didn't realize how good he was when his teams struggled, and even hung our heads when he embarrassed us in Indiana. But while KG has been like a torrid love affair, the Truth has been a long time marriage, and to paraphrase Orleans: Still the one that makes us laugh, Still the one that's our better half, We're still having fun, and you're still the one.
If his answer is KG, it's more likely than not you're talking to a Casual Fan or alternatively a Bandwagon Jumper. He probably has never heard of John Carroll. He probably doesn't know what city Tony Allen is from. And don't waste your time making Employee #8 references.
If his answer is Ray Allen, you're more likely than not talking to a chick. I find Ray Allen tends to resonate with the female fan base more than Paul Pierce or Kevin Garnett. The bad news: she probably doesn't know much about the Celtics and just finds Ray Allen cute. The good news: a chick approached you at a bar and started talking Celtics, so you got that going for you, which is nice.
The Rondo Corollary:
If his answer is Rondo abandon the PlayRyanGomes Presumption. You could be talking to a Die Hard, Casual Fan, Bandwagon Jumper, or chick. Rondo runs the gamut. You're on your own.
Topic: How to Identify a Celtic Diehard (Read 13496 times)