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Paul Pierce Article
« on: August 24, 2014, 07:36:01 PM »

Offline SportsCanuck

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Here's a little piece on Paul Pierce I wrote, feedback would be appreciated! :)

http://www.nbainformer.com/articles/paul-pierce-celtic-for-life


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Re: Paul Pierce Article
« Reply #1 on: August 24, 2014, 08:05:23 PM »

Offline Future Celtics Owner

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Quote
Naturally, when Pierce jumped ship to join Kevin Garnett and the Brooklyn Nets on June 28th, 2013, Celtics Fans were both shocked and devastated, that he no longer wanted to be a part of arguably the greatest championship dynasty in sports

Im going to be honest, but I stopped reading after this sentence. I believe the events were amicable between the Celtics and PP KG. They helped us out by waiving KG's no trade clause and we helped them out by placing them on the NETS with high hopes to win another championship. Nothing was done behind our back and they stayed true to the last second....very dif situation than Ray Allen.

The big thing was that Everyone knew the Celts needed to rebuild and both parties worked together, essentially, to make a beneficial trade for the Celtics.

Re: Paul Pierce Article
« Reply #2 on: August 24, 2014, 08:47:02 PM »

Offline Roy H.

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Quote
Naturally, when Pierce jumped ship to join Kevin Garnett and the Brooklyn Nets on June 28th, 2013, Celtics Fans were both shocked and devastated, that he no longer wanted to be a part of arguably the greatest championship dynasty in sports

Im going to be honest, but I stopped reading after this sentence. I believe the events were amicable between the Celtics and PP KG. They helped us out by waiving KG's no trade clause and we helped them out by placing them on the NETS with high hopes to win another championship. Nothing was done behind our back and they stayed true to the last second....very dif situation than Ray Allen.

The big thing was that Everyone knew the Celts needed to rebuild and both parties worked together, essentially, to make a beneficial trade for the Celtics.

It was the following sentence that bothered me:

Quote
After that moment, there were many a Celtics Fan, who tossed their Paul Pierce Jerseys in the trash...

I don't remember any reports of Celtics fans doing so; I think Paul Pierce was treated with the respect that he deserved when he was traded out of town.  He didn't abandon the team, he was shipped to Brooklyn to jump start the rebuilding process.

Quote
Much like fans of LeBron James, who originally abandoned their jerseys when James went to the Miami Heat, those same Celtics fans who discarded their Paul Pierce Jerseys, may someday once again wear them, as a sign of forgiveness.

Constructively, I think this is a strained analogy.  There's nothing to forgive. 


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Re: Paul Pierce Article
« Reply #3 on: August 24, 2014, 08:49:08 PM »

Offline gift

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I have to agree with the responses so far. I didn't even read it based on that.

Re: Paul Pierce Article
« Reply #4 on: August 24, 2014, 09:17:27 PM »

Offline Londongreen

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Dude, he didn't leave, he was traded. KG had a no trade cuase. PP did not. He had no choice. He didn't jump ship. He manned up and embraced that which was out of his hands.

I didn't bother reading and will not. Sorry.

Re: Paul Pierce Article
« Reply #5 on: August 24, 2014, 09:26:22 PM »

Offline DarkAzcura

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Sorry, I'm not reading the article based on the quotes in this thread. I don't mean offense, but I have no idea how you could believe anyone actually feels that way about Pierce. I also have no idea how you came to the conclusion that they left.

I also don't think he has to worry about "a sign of forgiveness":

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WQlTKLnC9LE
« Last Edit: August 24, 2014, 09:32:31 PM by DarkAzcura »

Re: Paul Pierce Article
« Reply #6 on: August 25, 2014, 01:04:24 PM »

Offline SportsCanuck

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Sorry that everyone here feels that way, this was just my opinion on what I thought the feeling was at the time Pierce went to Brooklyn. I wanted to hit the point home that Pierce will always be a Celtic, no matter what anyone thought of him playing for other teams, that was the overall ideal of the article.

There is some great constructive criticism from a lot of people here and I appreciate that, but for some people to say they won't even bother reading the rest of the article, just because of some differences of opinion is a little shortsighted and rude to be honest. It's your choice if you want to read the article, but it's really not necessary to actually say you aren't going to finish reading it, you don't like the article, you have differences of opinion, we get it.

I'm not bashing anyone's opinion here, but I don't think anyone here can say with 100% certainty, that based on the tens of millions of Celtics and Paul Pierce Fans, there weren't at least a few who were either shocked or devastated that Paul Pierce was traded, I certainly was. I thought that Pierce would close out his career with the Celtics, but I was wrong.

For those of you who offered well thought out criticisms on my article and actually read it in its entirety I thank you.

Please ignore the next post, I hit quote instead of modify.
« Last Edit: August 25, 2014, 01:25:33 PM by SportsCanuck »


"It doesn't matter who scores the points, it's who can get the ball to the scorer." - Larry Bird

Re: Paul Pierce Article
« Reply #7 on: August 25, 2014, 01:19:07 PM »

Offline SportsCanuck

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Sorry that everyone here feels that way, this was just my opinion on what I thought the feeling was at the time Pierce went to Brooklyn. I wanted to hit the point home that Pierce will always be a Celtic, no matter what anyone thought of him playing for other teams, that was the overall ideal of the article.

There is some great constructive criticism from a lot of people here and I appreciate that, but for some people to say they won't even bother reading the rest of the article, just because of some differences of opinion is a little shortsighted and rude to be honest.

I'm not bashing anyone's opinion here, but I don't think anyone here can say with 100% certainty, that based on the tens of millions of Celtics and Paul Pierce Fans, there weren't at least a few who were either shocked or devastated that Paul Pierce was traded, I certainly was. I thought that Pierce would close out his career with the Celtics, but I was wrong.

For those of you who offered well thought out criticisms on my article and actually read it in its entirety I thank you.


"It doesn't matter who scores the points, it's who can get the ball to the scorer." - Larry Bird

Re: Paul Pierce Article
« Reply #8 on: August 25, 2014, 01:28:39 PM »

Offline mgent

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Sorry that everyone here feels that way, this was just my opinion on what I thought the feeling was at the time Pierce went to Brooklyn. I wanted to hit the point home that Pierce will always be a Celtic, no matter what anyone thought of him playing for other teams, that was the overall ideal of the article.

There is some great constructive criticism from a lot of people here and I appreciate that, but for some people to say they won't even bother reading the rest of the article, just because of some differences of opinion is a little shortsighted and rude to be honest.

For those of you who offered well thought out criticisms on my article and actually read it in its entirety I thank you.
I agree.

On the other hand, you can't really make the same mistake as LeBron and not get ripped for it  ;)

Quote from: Paul Pierce
I left Boston?

http://www.nydailynews.com/sports/basketball/nets/doc-rivers-shoots-lebron-criticism-kg-pierce-article-1.1495947
Philly:

Anderson Varejao    Tiago Splitter    Matt Bonner
David West    Kenyon Martin    Brad Miller
Andre Iguodala    Josh Childress    Marquis Daniels
Dwyane Wade    Leandro Barbosa
Kirk Hinrich    Toney Douglas   + the legendary Kevin McHale

Re: Paul Pierce Article
« Reply #9 on: August 25, 2014, 01:33:54 PM »

Offline SportsCanuck

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Sorry that everyone here feels that way, this was just my opinion on what I thought the feeling was at the time Pierce went to Brooklyn. I wanted to hit the point home that Pierce will always be a Celtic, no matter what anyone thought of him playing for other teams, that was the overall ideal of the article.

There is some great constructive criticism from a lot of people here and I appreciate that, but for some people to say they won't even bother reading the rest of the article, just because of some differences of opinion is a little shortsighted and rude to be honest.

For those of you who offered well thought out criticisms on my article and actually read it in its entirety I thank you.
I agree.

On the other hand, you can't really make the same mistake as LeBron and not get ripped for it  ;)

Quote from: Paul Pierce
I left Boston?

http://www.nydailynews.com/sports/basketball/nets/doc-rivers-shoots-lebron-criticism-kg-pierce-article-1.1495947

Thank you mgent, I admit that possibly I put Paul Piece in the same category as LeBron, and maybe that was my anger at the time Pierce was traded to Brooklyn, and I shouldn't have written this article based on my specific anger. Next time I will be more subjective. :)


"It doesn't matter who scores the points, it's who can get the ball to the scorer." - Larry Bird

Re: Paul Pierce Article
« Reply #10 on: August 25, 2014, 01:42:44 PM »

Offline bdm860

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So I read the article (very easy read, only like 5 short paragraphs, give the guy a chance), but I still share the opinion of the thread so far. The whole thing seemed like a huge stretch to me.

First, you're talking about Pierce signing with the Wizards.  I think most people thought he’d re-sign with the Nets or go to the Clips, so the Wizard signing was a surprise, but not the head scratcher you make it out to be.  People were surprised by it, but not confused.  I feel most people felt it made a lot of sense, but you make it sound like he signed with the Sixers. 

Then there was Pierce “jumping ship” to a shocked, devastated, confused, and angry fan base, something I never saw.

Besides that, I think the article needs a little more polish.  Some punctuation errors (a lot of your commas don’t need to be there), along with sentences that weren’t worded as smoothly as they could have been.

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Re: Paul Pierce Article
« Reply #11 on: August 25, 2014, 01:50:11 PM »

Offline D.o.s.

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You use 'once again' twice in your first sentence, reads a little stilted.

I also agree that categorizing Pierce's departure as 'jumping ship' is a stretch, but that's all right.

This piece seems like it's half laudatory and half critical, sometimes within the same sentence, which has the effect of tonal inconsistency. Also, at five paragraphs, this feels like an outline for something that could be three or four times that long -- and still worth reading.
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Re: Paul Pierce Article
« Reply #12 on: August 25, 2014, 03:14:12 PM »

Offline Csfan1984

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I agree with previous post that the article doesn't seem like it's worth reading based on the comments. I did read it and parts of it are off to me. If you just want feed back on more of the form of the story then that makes sense to ask for that kind of response. The piece feels more of a rough draft with numerous view points/angles some of which are in factual error which others have pointed out.

Also I would be mindful of the concept of labeling and ownership more in the writing. Basically write specifically use "some", "I", "could". As readers people don't want to see themselves grouped or even a chance of it.

If it helps with future writes you can be creative with a obvious minority opinion, action or view when writing by illustrating a "split second", "short lived", puzzled or emotional reaction that is held at bay. For this instance you write something along the lines (with ownership); 

"it is but for a instant but all my years of seeing Nets as foes compels me to cast off clarity. I begin to demonize a former beloved Celtic. I struggle with my joy of remembering his day as finals M.V.P. with the conditioned response that sees all Celtics that become Nets as turn coats. I quickly focus on what I truly believe, that Pierce can never be one of those hated Nets. Pierce has and always will... bleed green".

I'm not great at writing but hope the example above of an  angle and ownership ideas that I was trying to suggest come through.

Good Luck of future writes.

Re: Paul Pierce Article
« Reply #13 on: August 25, 2014, 04:25:33 PM »

Offline celticsclay

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Nobody threw out their Paul Pierce Jersey that I know of. Why would people be mad at pierce? What could he have done? Say "I refuse to report to Brooklyn and you have to play me here!"?

Putting his departure in the same paragraph as Lebron who was a free agent, left his home town, and announced it on national television is really insulting to Pierce. 

Re: Paul Pierce Article
« Reply #14 on: August 25, 2014, 05:15:18 PM »

Offline SportsCanuck

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Nobody threw out their Paul Pierce Jersey that I know of. Why would people be mad at pierce? What could he have done? Say "I refuse to report to Brooklyn and you have to play me here!"?

Putting his departure in the same paragraph as Lebron who was a free agent, left his home town, and announced it on national television is really insulting to Pierce.

Like I said, while I appreciate the constructive criticism of my article, I really don't think the few of you here can speak on the fans of the Celtics, as to where or not they were or weren't mad at Pierce. Maybe I missed the target on what I was trying to say, I've never claimed to be an expert Basketball Analyst, I was just trying to ring home the point that Pierce will always be a Celtic, no matter which team he is playing for.

I still don't comprehend some of you saying that the article isn't worth reading, based on some of the comments, considering how much garbage there is on the internet these days. I tried my best to write a decent quality article and I hoped some people would enjoy reading it, but I guess I was wrong.

Again I appreciate the well thought out points a lot of you wrote, so I thank you for that. I've deleted the article from the website, there's no point in displaying an article that a lot of people have a deep hatred for.
« Last Edit: August 25, 2014, 05:40:46 PM by SportsCanuck »


"It doesn't matter who scores the points, it's who can get the ball to the scorer." - Larry Bird