Has anyone here ever lost a child?

[greg683x]

Thanks for sharing both of those stories.

As bad as they are it?s good to hear that people have come out on the other side of this and still live happy lives. The brother in law is a sad story but it?s reinforcing how dangerous alcohol can be when using it as a crutch.

This all just feels like you?ve been forced to join an exclusive club that 95% of the country can?t join and the price of admission is something no one should have to pay.

There are no stages with a beginning and end in the grief process from what I?ve experienced so far.  Those feelings, whether it be anger, depression, guilt, bartering, etc all just take turns floating in and out of your head. Guilt is an awful awful demon.  If we had just taken her to children?s hospital, which was an extra 35 or so minutes away, instead of our local hospital, there?s a very good chance she?d still be here with us.  We just didn?t think this was that serious and chose convenience.  We?re gonna have to live with that

Thanks again for all your kind words.

Let this be a sad memory that we share in an otherwise long happy life, said by President Red seems to be a good mindset to focus on at the moment

[lbgreen33]

Hey Greg, my prayers are with you and your family. I have suffered loss in my life, but not a child, which seems so hard to imagine.  When I was 17, my dad committed suicide and I found him. He was my hero and a huge Celtics fan.
I remember at the time feeling it couldn't be real, like I would wake up thinking it was a bad dream.
Time is about the only thing that helped me then, time to come to grips with it and time to learn to laugh again and time begin to find my new normal.  All I can do is type something because, I understand pain and it has many layers. I am 63 now and have had other challenges in my life. I will say for me, life and pain are a journey. I guess at times I think of life as a marathon, not a sprint, if that makes any sense. Sure, life goes fast, but truthfully Pain can seem to last forever. It doesn't, things get easier, you Will find your new normal. I think it helps just knowing that the person walking down the street has a story too, you just might not know.  I wish you love and peace, and I pray for strength for you.

[greg683x]

Hey Greg, my prayers are with you and your family. I have suffered loss in my life, but not a child, which seems so hard to imagine.  When I was 17, my dad committed suicide and I found him. He was my hero and a huge Celtics fan.
I remember at the time feeling it couldn't be real, like I would wake up thinking it was a bad dream.
Time is about the only thing that helped me then, time to come to grips with it and time to learn to laugh again and time begin to find my new normal.  All I can do is type something because, I understand pain and it has many layers. I am 63 now and have had other challenges in my life. I will say for me, life and pain are a journey. I guess at times I think of life as a marathon, not a sprint, if that makes any sense. Sure, life goes fast, but truthfully Pain can seem to last forever. It doesn't, things get easier, you Will find your new normal. I think it helps just knowing that the person walking down the street has a story too, you just might not know.  I wish you love and peace, and I pray for strength for you.

Thank you for sharing that.  What an awful experience that must have been, I?m glad you came out of it ok.  I?m sorry about your Dad, that would have broke me at 17.

The feeling that it cant be real I can definitely identify with.  At the hospital when she was on life support with no brain activity, I kept waiting for a doctor to come in and say she bounced back and everything seems to be ok.

Even today, even after we buried her last Friday, I?ll see my wife texted me and I imagine her saying ?she?s here, we?ve got her back!?   I can?t accept that it happened, I just keep waiting for the world to reset itself.  I guess this is all still too fresh and I?m still stuck in that beginning stage you mentioned.  I?d been looking forward to summertime for months and now that it?s here, I just want this summer and year to hurry up and be over with.

[lbgreen33]

Hey Greg, my prayers are with you and your family. I have suffered loss in my life, but not a child, which seems so hard to imagine.  When I was 17, my dad committed suicide and I found him. He was my hero and a huge Celtics fan.
I remember at the time feeling it couldn't be real, like I would wake up thinking it was a bad dream.
Time is about the only thing that helped me then, time to come to grips with it and time to learn to laugh again and time begin to find my new normal.  All I can do is type something because, I understand pain and it has many layers. I am 63 now and have had other challenges in my life. I will say for me, life and pain are a journey. I guess at times I think of life as a marathon, not a sprint, if that makes any sense. Sure, life goes fast, but truthfully Pain can seem to last forever. It doesn't, things get easier, you Will find your new normal. I think it helps just knowing that the person walking down the street has a story too, you just might not know.  I wish you love and peace, and I pray for strength for you.

Thank you for sharing that.  What an awful experience that must have been, I?m glad you came out of it ok.  I?m sorry about your Dad, that would have broke me at 17.

The feeling that it cant be real I can definitely identify with.  At the hospital when she was on life support with no brain activity, I kept waiting for a doctor to come in and say she bounced back and everything seems to be ok.

Even today, even after we buried her last Friday, I?ll see my wife texted me and I imagine her saying ?she?s here, we?ve got her back!?   I can?t accept that it happened, I just keep waiting for the world to reset itself.  I guess this is all still too fresh and I?m still stuck in that beginning stage you mentioned.  I?d been looking forward to summertime for months and now that it?s here, I just want this summer and year to hurry up and be over with.

Hang in there Greg, man it sucks, and this is the hardest time.  It's like it kind of ends for others, but for your house it doesn't! I know that feeling and it doesn't seem fair, I guess because it isn't. Type away my friend, I know everyone here feels for you.

[greg683x]

I just want to update this, not that any of you are on the edge of your seat, but you all offered some good advice and said some nice things to me, I figured I'd provide an update.

Its been a rollarcoaster year.  A month or so after our daughter Alaina passed away, we got unexpectedly pregnant (i know its weird to say 'unexpectedly pregnant', but its really hard for us to concieve naturally, so this was way out of left field).  My wife just gave birth to her two weeks ago on St Patricks day.  A lot of emotions surrounding all of this for us, and id be lieing if I said we were ready for it, but its uplifted our house, and made my other daughter happy to be a big sister again.  The NICU department cared for my late daughter when she was born there at washington hospital center, and knew our back story, and they all bought us a nice gift basket that they gave us on delivery day, just the most wonderful people youve ever met in your life.  THERES STILL GOOD IN THE WORLD!

I said to my wife when we visited our daughters grave on christmas eve.  "If someone told me at the beginning of this year we would be burying her in May, I'd be in utter disbelief.  If someone told me when we were burying her in May, that at christmas we'd be six months pregnant with another child, I'd be in utter disbelief."  Needless to say, when she was born on the 17th, I was in utter disbelief.

Anyways, thanks again for all the nice things you guys said to me and all the support you offered when I was at a pretty low point last year.  Go Celtics!

[chicagoceltic]

Congratulations, Greg. My very best wishes to you and your family.