How Gordon got his Groove Back

[KG Living Legend]

 
 On the plane ride to the West Coast the guys were doing their normal thing. Watching movies, listening to Music, playing cards.

 Seemingly out of nowhere Gordon stands up and says, yo Kyrie things are about to change around here tonight, to which Kyrie says shut your mouth cry baby. No! Gordon says, then he fires a Gatorade bottle directly at Irving's head, just missing him, and the bottle hits Timelord in the head waking him from his nap.

 Irving puts down his pencil and stops his self portrait of himself, stands up and starts charging towards Hayward, Jumping up and Punches Gordon directly in the eye.

 Stevens yells to break it up. Horford and Baynes tell Stevens to sit down. Let them finish this! Baynes Roars! Gordon puts Irving in a headlock, and says who's the man! Kyrie says I am. Gordon squeezes tighter. Who's the man gosh darn it! Kyrie says Me!

 Gordon then picks up Irving over his head and power slams him to the ground, jumps on top of him pinning his arms, Raises his fist, and says live or Die Man. To which Kyrie says in defeat. Your the Man Gordon Hayward.

 Hayward picks up Irving off the floor and says, that's right Kyrie, don't ever make me show you the dark side of Gordon again.

 The Whole team than erupts into laughter and excitement. And after that day the Celtics became a team again.

[mgent]

 
 On the plane ride to the West Coast the guys were doing their normal thing. Watching movies, listening to Movies, playing cards.

 Seemingly out of know where Gordon stands up and says yo Kyrie things are about to change around here tonight, to which Kyrie says shut your mouth cry baby. No! Gordon says, then he fires a Gatorade bottle directly at Irving's head, just missing him, and the bottle hits Timelord in the head waking him from his nap.

Irving puts down his pencil and stops his self portrait of himself, stands up and starts charging towards Hayward, Jumping up and Punches Gordon directly in the eye.

 Stevens yells to break it up. Horford and Baynes tell Stevens to sit down. Let them finish this! Baynes Roars! Gordon puts Irving in a headlock, and says who's the man! Kyrie says I am. Gordon squeezes tighter. Who's the man gosh darn it! Kyrie says Me!

 Gordon then picks up Irving over his head and power slams him to the ground, jumps on top of him pinning his arms, Raises his fist, and says live or Die Man. To which Kyrie says in defeat. Your the Man Gordon Hayward.

 Hayward picks up Irving off the floor and says, that's right Kyrie, don't ever make me show you the dark side of Gordon again.

 The Whole team than erupts into laughter and excitement. And after that day the Celtics became a team again.

 

[Rosco917]

I'm taking for granted that this is a dream. lol. We all know Kyrie has bodyguards.

[Chris22]

His ankle healed.

[droopdog7]

[Monkhouse]

 
 On the plane ride to the West Coast the guys were doing their normal thing. Watching movies, listening to Movies, playing cards.

 Seemingly out of know where Gordon stands up and says yo Kyrie things are about to change around here tonight, to which Kyrie says shut your mouth cry baby. No! Gordon says, then he fires a Gatorade bottle directly at Irving's head, just missing him, and the bottle hits Timelord in the head waking him from his nap.

 Irving puts down his pencil and stops his self portrait of himself, stands up and starts charging towards Hayward, Jumping up and Punches Gordon directly in the eye.

 Stevens yells to break it up. Horford and Baynes tell Stevens to sit down. Let them finish this! Baynes Roars! Gordon puts Irving in a headlock, and says who's the man! Kyrie says I am. Gordon squeezes tighter. Who's the man gosh darn it! Kyrie says Me!

 Gordon then picks up Irving over his head and power slams him to the ground, jumps on top of him pinning his arms, Raises his fist, and says live or Die Man. To which Kyrie says in defeat. Your the Man Gordon Hayward.

 Hayward picks up Irving off the floor and says, that's right Kyrie, don't ever make me show you the dark side of Gordon again.

 The Whole team than erupts into laughter and excitement. And after that day the Celtics became a team again.

Okay I lol'ed at the pencil part. TP for the laugh.

[smokeablount]

 
 On the plane ride to the West Coast the guys were doing their normal thing. Watching movies, listening to Movies, playing cards.

 Seemingly out of know where Gordon stands up and says yo Kyrie things are about to change around here tonight, to which Kyrie says shut your mouth cry baby. No! Gordon says, then he fires a Gatorade bottle directly at Irving's head, just missing him, and the bottle hits Timelord in the head waking him from his nap.

 Irving puts down his pencil and stops his self portrait of himself, stands up and starts charging towards Hayward, Jumping up and Punches Gordon directly in the eye.

 Stevens yells to break it up. Horford and Baynes tell Stevens to sit down. Let them finish this! Baynes Roars! Gordon puts Irving in a headlock, and says who's the man! Kyrie says I am. Gordon squeezes tighter. Who's the man gosh darn it! Kyrie says Me!

 Gordon then picks up Irving over his head and power slams him to the ground, jumps on top of him pinning his arms, Raises his fist, and says live or Die Man. To which Kyrie says in defeat. Your the Man Gordon Hayward.

 Hayward picks up Irving off the floor and says, that's right Kyrie, don't ever make me show you the dark side of Gordon again.

 The Whole team than erupts into laughter and excitement. And after that day the Celtics became a team again.

KG Living Legend broke the story, and ESPN immediately fired Woj and replaced him with KGLL.  It became universally known among NBA fans that when news broke, you might as well call it a "Living Legend Landmine."  Regarding the 2018-2019 Celtics, it was after this magical evening flying cross country, that the Sacramento Kings lost every single one of their remaining games, including 2 along the way against the eventual champion Celtics.  It was spawned by the NBA suspending Bojan Bogdanovic for confusing NBA fans, who thought he was Bogdan Bogdanovic.  He received a liftime ban from the NBA and now plays pickup ball with Michael Ray Richardson on Saturdays.

The increased lottery odds + Adam Silver's freezer resulted in Sacramento landing the #2 pick in the 2019 draft.  Fans guzzle champagne.

The Knicks land #1 but are torn between the top 3 guys on their board, Zion Williamson, RJ Barrett and Jah Morant.  In a moment of drunken confusion, James Dolan tells Adam Silver he would like to select "Ma Durant" instead of Jah Morant, resulting in the first mother/son pair of top 2 picks in the history of American sports.  Chad Ford immediately labels Ma Durant a Tier 1 prospect.  While Ma Durant goes on to a HOF career, the choice allows the Celtics to draft Zion.  Kyrie then decides he wants to stay with the Celtics and form the Big Dukie 3 with Zion and Tatum.  He signs for the taxpayer MLE, and the Celtics trade Horford + Yabu for Kevin Durant, who demands a trade to the Celtics so he can beat his mom 4x a year and also enjoy home cooking.  His mom's food, not home court advantage.  Ma Durant agrees to cook for Kevin if he stays off Twitter.  He welches, and Tweets anyway.

Danny pulls off his costume to reveal a 101-year old Red Auerbach, who admits to faking his death mainly due to smoking going out of style.

[footey]

 
 On the plane ride to the West Coast the guys were doing their normal thing. Watching movies, listening to Movies, playing cards.

 Seemingly out of know where Gordon stands up and says yo Kyrie things are about to change around here tonight, to which Kyrie says shut your mouth cry baby. No! Gordon says, then he fires a Gatorade bottle directly at Irving's head, just missing him, and the bottle hits Timelord in the head waking him from his nap.

 Irving puts down his pencil and stops his self portrait of himself, stands up and starts charging towards Hayward, Jumping up and Punches Gordon directly in the eye.

 Stevens yells to break it up. Horford and Baynes tell Stevens to sit down. Let them finish this! Baynes Roars! Gordon puts Irving in a headlock, and says who's the man! Kyrie says I am. Gordon squeezes tighter. Who's the man gosh darn it! Kyrie says Me!

 Gordon then picks up Irving over his head and power slams him to the ground, jumps on top of him pinning his arms, Raises his fist, and says live or Die Man. To which Kyrie says in defeat. Your the Man Gordon Hayward.

 Hayward picks up Irving off the floor and says, that's right Kyrie, don't ever make me show you the dark side of Gordon again.

 The Whole team than erupts into laughter and excitement. And after that day the Celtics became a team again.

TP, KGLL, hysterical.

[slamtheking]

 On the plane ride to the West Coast the guys were doing their normal thing. Watching movies, listening to Movies, playing cards.

 Seemingly out of know where Gordon stands up and says yo Kyrie things are about to change around here tonight, to which Kyrie says shut your mouth cry baby. No! Gordon says, then he fires a Gatorade bottle directly at Irving's head, just missing him, and the bottle hits Timelord in the head waking him from his nap.

 Irving puts down his pencil and stops his self portrait of himself, stands up and starts charging towards Hayward, Jumping up and Punches Gordon directly in the eye.

 Stevens yells to break it up. Horford and Baynes tell Stevens to sit down. Let them finish this! Baynes Roars! Gordon puts Irving in a headlock, and says who's the man! Kyrie says I am. Gordon squeezes tighter. Who's the man gosh darn it! Kyrie says Me!

 Gordon then picks up Irving over his head and power slams him to the ground, jumps on top of him pinning his arms, Raises his fist, and says live or Die Man. To which Kyrie says in defeat. Your the Man Gordon Hayward.

 Hayward picks up Irving off the floor and says, that's right Kyrie, don't ever make me show you the dark side of Gordon again.

 The Whole team than erupts into laughter and excitement. And after that day the Celtics became a team again.

KG Living Legend broke the story, and ESPN immediately fired Woj and replaced him with KGLL.  It became universally known among NBA fans that when news broke, you might as well call it a "Living Legend Landmine."  Regarding the 2018-2019 Celtics, it was after this magical evening flying cross country, that the Sacramento Kings lost every single one of their remaining games, including 2 along the way against the eventual champion Celtics.  It was spawned by the NBA suspending Bojan Bogdanovic for confusing NBA fans, who thought he was Bogdan Bogdanovic.  He received a liftime ban from the NBA and now plays pickup ball with Michael Ray Richardson on Saturdays.

The increased lottery odds + Adam Silver's freezer resulted in Sacramento landing the #2 pick in the 2019 draft.  Fans guzzle champagne.

The Knicks land #1 but are torn between the top 3 guys on their board, Zion Williamson, RJ Barrett and Jah Morant.  In a moment of drunken confusion, James Dolan tells Adam Silver he would like to select "Ma Durant" instead of Jah Morant, resulting in the first mother/son pair of top 2 picks in the history of American sports.  Chad Ford immediately labels Ma Durant a Tier 1 prospect.  While Ma Durant goes on to a HOF career, the choice allows the Celtics to draft Zion.  Kyrie then decides he wants to stay with the Celtics and form the Big Dukie 3 with Zion and Tatum.  He signs for the taxpayer MLE, and the Celtics trade Horford + Yabu for Kevin Durant, who demands a trade to the Celtics so he can beat his mom 4x a year and also enjoy home cooking.  His mom's food, not home court advantage.  Ma Durant agrees to cook for Kevin if he stays off Twitter.  He welches, and Tweets anyway.

Danny pulls off his costume to reveal a 101-year old Red Auerbach, who admits to faking his death mainly due to smoking going out of style.

this is what immediately came to mind when I read that

[Sophomore]

All I ask is that they don’t lose to the Kings. Which of course they will.

[KG Living Legend]

 Thanks fellas for the laughs. Seriously though Kyrie said that something happened on the plane ride and I'll leave it at that.

 I'm just filling in the blanks. Go Celtics 💪

[LarBrd33]

KGLL elaborated on my version from last night:

"In the toxic lockerroom right before the game, Hayward screamed “LOOK AT ME!!!” at his teammates. Silence fell on the room. He then proceeded to wallop himself over and over in the eye until Kyrie Irving and Jaylen Brown rushed over to intervene. Collectively the team broke into tears and hugged each other for a solid 5 minutes. The season was never the same again."

The truth is somewhere in the middle... but we can all agree The Toxic Avenger came through last night.

[ozgod]

 On the plane ride to the West Coast the guys were doing their normal thing. Watching movies, listening to Movies, playing cards.

 Seemingly out of know where Gordon stands up and says yo Kyrie things are about to change around here tonight, to which Kyrie says shut your mouth cry baby. No! Gordon says, then he fires a Gatorade bottle directly at Irving's head, just missing him, and the bottle hits Timelord in the head waking him from his nap.

 Irving puts down his pencil and stops his self portrait of himself, stands up and starts charging towards Hayward, Jumping up and Punches Gordon directly in the eye.

 Stevens yells to break it up. Horford and Baynes tell Stevens to sit down. Let them finish this! Baynes Roars! Gordon puts Irving in a headlock, and says who's the man! Kyrie says I am. Gordon squeezes tighter. Who's the man gosh darn it! Kyrie says Me!

 Gordon then picks up Irving over his head and power slams him to the ground, jumps on top of him pinning his arms, Raises his fist, and says live or Die Man. To which Kyrie says in defeat. Your the Man Gordon Hayward.

 Hayward picks up Irving off the floor and says, that's right Kyrie, don't ever make me show you the dark side of Gordon again.

 The Whole team than erupts into laughter and excitement. And after that day the Celtics became a team again.

  TP for a good laugh 

[KG Living Legend]

 
 On the plane ride to the West Coast the guys were doing their normal thing. Watching movies, listening to Movies, playing cards.

 Seemingly out of know where Gordon stands up and says yo Kyrie things are about to change around here tonight, to which Kyrie says shut your mouth cry baby. No! Gordon says, then he fires a Gatorade bottle directly at Irving's head, just missing him, and the bottle hits Timelord in the head waking him from his nap.

 Irving puts down his pencil and stops his self portrait of himself, stands up and starts charging towards Hayward, Jumping up and Punches Gordon directly in the eye.

 Stevens yells to break it up. Horford and Baynes tell Stevens to sit down. Let them finish this! Baynes Roars! Gordon puts Irving in a headlock, and says who's the man! Kyrie says I am. Gordon squeezes tighter. Who's the man gosh darn it! Kyrie says Me!

 Gordon then picks up Irving over his head and power slams him to the ground, jumps on top of him pinning his arms, Raises his fist, and says live or Die Man. To which Kyrie says in defeat. Your the Man Gordon Hayward.

 Hayward picks up Irving off the floor and says, that's right Kyrie, don't ever make me show you the dark side of Gordon again.

 The Whole team than erupts into laughter and excitement. And after that day the Celtics became a team again.

TP, KGLL, hysterical.

 Thanks man. Tp to all the TPers.

[GreenCoffeeBean]

Hayward has a black eye and Kyrie is out tonight with a "sore everything" so the story matches up.