5 Reasons My Team Is The Smartest:
1) I have a legitimate space man, Neil Armstrong. Sure its fine for Stephen Hawking to speculate about the cosmos...Neil Armstrong has gazed into the void, and the void gazed back. And Winked. And gave him its number.
2) Nearly everyone including my two smartest guys are self-medicated educated. Abraham Lincoln and Ernest Hemingway didn't need no stinkin' college to shape America's intellectual landscape. These men are just naturally so intelligent, that they can do it on their own.
3) And they're not some kind of ancient smart that is completely irrelevant today..they're all mostly modern smart. Hacksaw Jim Duggan just got back from Paris. He delivered a lecture on his recently published treatise on the evolution of language compared with the earliest known instances of communal cooking fires. Huey Freeman is social revolutionary. Tupac Shakur might appear to be a thug on the surface (and maybe its because he has 'thug life' tattooed across his stomach), but give that guy a rubix cube and he'll solve it in 5 seconds flat (he'll shoot it).
4) Al Bundy and Tommy Heinsohn are great examples of the "everyman smart" that is so often ignored in this liberal elitist ultimate drafting contest. Both men, completely uneducated and maybe the most base examples of an American male are geniuses in their own right. Al Bundy has done to pessimism what Van Gogh was able to do to a Starry Night. He has done to hope what LeBron James has done to Cleveland. He is a master in his own depressing way. Tommy Heinsohn on the other hand is responsible for the creation of the "Tommy Point". He also invented scotch and homer-centric color commentary.
5) If you don't vote for Bill The Butcher he'll kill you.
That 4th paragraph was brilliantly done. But I'll give this my best effort
SMARTEST
1. So umm, hey Neil Armstrong, on that trip to space, any shout outs you wanna give? You know, to maybe ummm... CALCULUS?!?! And while you're at it, maybe
one to my boy Sir Isaac Newton for helping you out with that whole Calculus thing?? I'd like to see how that ship made it up there otherwise... if it did even really happen!
http://www.theonion.com/articles/conspiracy-theorist-convinces-neil-armstrong-moon,2796/2. And how about Rene Descartes? One of the most brilliant mathematicians and philosophers of all time. One day, his kids were banging pots and pans in the kitchen while Rene was doing some serious work expanding his Cartesian plane into a 3rd dimension and Rene shouted, "Will you please stop! I can't think!" And then he disappeared. That's how powerful his statement was to the world.
3. Let's put it this way, this guy was certainly not signed by the celtics because of his athleticism. See him holding his head? That's because it was hurting from having to use it so much to make up for lack of athleticism.
4. Lastly, you can't forget about the UCLA educated Bill Walton. Not only does he know more about the history of western civilization than any man, but also is highly cultured in the age of romanticism.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6KkrccHEAqg5. Chuck norris doesn't read books. He stares them down and scares them into directly giving him the information he wants. Chuck Norris can also predict the shuffle on his iPod.
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Topic: Ultimate Draft II (Congrats to Roy for winning Best Overall) (Read 213493 times)