I'm not going to even bother. Adding the two best players you can, like LeBron and DHoward to any of the 6 pieces of garbage you listed still isn't going to get the job done versus the Celtics.
Heck, LeBron, DHoward and any of those 6 pieces of garbage couldn't defeat any of the teams in the conference finals last year as well as San Antonio, Phoenix, and Cleveland.
There's just no quality or cohesion in any of the available parts you gave to put together a team good enough to beat any of the teams I listed.
That said I do believe a great two player pair with enough decent talent around them could win it all and beat the Big Three's that exist in SA, Boston, Houston, Phoenix and so on. But there has to be some talent there.
For instance, if you put LeBron on the Magic in place of Turkoglu, I think they win a title. Now some might consider Rashard Lewis good enough to be considered in a Big Three type of thing, but I don't. He might get paid like an elite player but I find him rather average over all.