No bench.
It's hard to agree with this.
I think the starters are Irving/Brown/Hayward/Morris/Horford. That will no doubt change at some point, it being the nature of the beast.
Rozier, Smart, and Baynes added to that makes an eight-man rotation. Those three are all reliable NBA rotation players, and that's enough to doubt your "no bench" claim.
No defense.
Obviously your claim is over the top. But surely it would be a real achievement for this team to be even a top third defensive team; the biggest challenge is going to be defensive rebounding. Last year's team was poor at it, and it looks like mostly downgrades at the various positions. Brad Stevens' repeated insistence that Jaylen has got to be "a lockdown defender" this year is an acknowledgment that wing defense is also in doubt; Hayward is simply not going to be a wing stopper.
No rebounding.
Again, this is over the top. But I'm willing to allow for rhetoric here, and mostly agree with you.
I say "mostly" because I think that offensive rebounding is incidental to Brad's plan and expectations - at least judging by his history as an NBA coach. He'd rather keep the lane fluid and have the team get back in transition than crash the offensive boards. I won't go so far as to say that offensive rebounding doesn't matter, but it's clearly down the list of priorities.
No clutch role players that just make the big plays.
Red Auerbach said that ALL players are role players (if you want to say what being a Boston Celtic means, put that at the top of the page).
If you mean bench guys when you say "role players", then I disagree that a team needs that to win a championship.
If you mean all players, I'd just suggest that you take a look at the last couple of minutes of the Finals the season before last. Kyrie Irving made a play that's about as clutch as it gets.
I'm sure next season will be exciting but let's not get ahead of ourselves just yet.
Always good advice.
Actually, I'm confident that the 17-18 Celtics will be pretty darned exciting.