I need help regarding my mother + her arthritis (55 years old)?

[TradeProposalDude]

My mom is 55. She began having arthritis about 8 years ago. She has rheumatoid arthritis specifically. This disease has eaten away her red blood cells through a gradual process. She had knee replacement surgery completed in 2007 which to date has actually helped her mobility, but you could make the argument that she didn't perform enough post-surgery exercise immediately following the procedure which is necessary for regaining strength and flexibility in one's joints.

Since May of 2010, she has not left our home. In fact she has not taken one step downstairs, as we live in a split level home where the bedrooms and living room are upstairs. She says that even though she can walk around fine (and she can...) she has no balance. This lack of balance she claims makes it nearly impossible for her to go up and down stairs, and conduct normal day to day activities even people with arthritis could possibly perform.

The disease, as it appears, has most recently eaten away at her shoulders which needs surgery to repair. She is afraid of going to the doctor even if we buy a transportable chair to get her up and downstairs because doctors tend to make my mother feel even more helpless. The most doctor she visited claims she needs hip replacement surgery, as surgically operating on the hip would open up her mobility. But my mother's brother is a doctor too and he thinks hip replacement surgery isn't necessary. My mother is of the opinion that hip replacement surgery would only exacerbate an already bad situation.

For those of you who have arthritis and/or are close to those who have this disease, are you familiar with this kind of condition and the remedies at this point that will help my mother get out of this terrible cycle? It has even affected her psychological condition. I took enough psychology courses when I was in college to gauge that her sense of worthlessness and constant crying may indicate an incidence of depression. To make a bad situation even worse.

[Eja117]

The only thing I can even begin to suggest is prayer.

It looks from your writing like if she doesn't take a risk things will get worse before they get better.  If she doesn't want to take the risk for whatever reason then they idea shifts to making her present situation as good as possible, but then she has to realize that might mean never leaving the house ever again. 

Maybe you can bring in a therapist? If you think she's in depression maybe a psychiatrist or psych nurse too, but I'm not sure if you can find those who make house calls. Maybe some clergy could make house calls. It would reduce isolation and then she might have motivation to take steps further.

[Roy H.]

Maybe you can bring in a therapist? If you think she's in depression maybe a psychiatrist or psych nurse too, but I'm not sure if you can find those who make house calls. Maybe some clergy could make house calls. It would reduce isolation and then she might have motivation to take steps further.

In that regard, see if your community has crisis services, or something of that nature.  Here in Maine, there's an 800 number people can call 24/7 to talk to somebody with mental health training.  They can also send out crisis workers day and night to meet with people and help them determine their next course of action. 

I would also suggest talking to your uncle, to impress upon him the importance of the situation.  If she's relying heavily on his medical opinion, perhaps he could talk to her and comfort her.  I don't know how much of that has been done, but it might be an option.  If he won't be helpful, then encourage your mother to get another opinion.

Lastly, I know a lot of people have had good luck with holistic approaches, but I wouldn't even know where to begin there.

[Eja117]

Come to think of it you probably wouldn't tell a person with depression that if they don't take a risk they might never leave the house.

I think you express "Mom I'm concerned and scared that if you don't get evaluated for surgery or go to the hospital you might never leave the house again. If that's what you want then maybe we can talk about that but if you do want to go out again then maybe we need to talk about what would have to happen first for that to work"

I hope that makes sense.

[Redz]

I have psoriasis.  Thankfully I have not had to deal with much psoriatic arthritis, but some friends have.  I have, however, had to visit the rheumotologist frequently to get treatment with various drugs for the psoriasis.  It seems arthritis certain arthritis medicines that were used to treat the arthritis in patients with psoriatic arthritis had great results with the skin related symptoms as well.

I don't know if your mother has tried every medicine under the moon, but I know a bunch of people who have had great results with Humira (this worked well for me for a couple of years), Enbrel, and Remicaid (which I'm on now).

Not sure what to say for the emotional stuff.  The whole think stinks and I'm sorry she's going through all of that. 

[LB3533]

Maybe you can bring in a therapist? If you think she's in depression maybe a psychiatrist or psych nurse too, but I'm not sure if you can find those who make house calls. Maybe some clergy could make house calls. It would reduce isolation and then she might have motivation to take steps further.

In that regard, see if your community has crisis services, or something of that nature.  Here in Maine, there's an 800 number people can call 24/7 to talk to somebody with mental health training.  They can also send out crisis workers day and night to meet with people and help them determine their next course of action. 

I would also suggest talking to your uncle, to impress upon him the importance of the situation.  If she's relying heavily on his medical opinion, perhaps he could talk to her and comfort her.  I don't know how much of that has been done, but it might be an option.  If he won't be helpful, then encourage your mother to get another opinion.

Lastly, I know a lot of people have had good luck with holistic approaches, but I wouldn't even know where to begin there.

I work in the "whole-istic" healing field and Tradeproposaldude, if your mother is afraid of western doctors or just doesn't like them, I would recommend she try acupuncture for her RA, poor equilibrium and most likely depression.

Here's a brief abstract from a research review article: http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/20204371

*Note: for every pro-research article published there are numerous con-research articles published to refute them. So take all research articles with a grain of salt.

Also here's a brief youtube clip related with arthritis & acupuncture: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t7t_9hfh8nM&feature=relmfu

The guy kinda looks like Wyc...but not really.

The thing is, you love and care about your mom, so it is time to take some assertive action. The current path your mom has taken since 2010 isn't working.

Have her try something, because sustaining the current status quo will most likely aggravate the unhealthy symptoms.

If you have any questions, don't hesitate to ask or send me a PM.

Good luck.

[Army_of_One_Nation]

Acupuncture?

[jaybahs]

Oh boy this lockout has got to come to an end ...