Proper NBA Team Names

[SShorefan 4.0]

Last night I thought that the Memphis team should be called the Memphis Kings (after Elvis of course) and that trading the name Grizzlies to Sacramento somewhat fit.  This opened up Pandora's Box and I present to you:

My list of Proper NBA Team Names

Teams that Stay the Same

Boston      Celtics
Chicago           Bulls
Denver      Nuggets
Detroit      Pistons
Indiana      Pacers
New York   Knicks
Orlando           Magic
Philly      76ers
Phoenix           Suns
San Antonio   Spurs
Toronto           Raptors

Teams that Trade Names

Memphis           Kings 
Minnesota   Lakers (original name)
New Orleans   Jazz   (original name)
Sacramento   Grizzlies
* LA & Utah receive Timberwolves and Hornets and then opt for a new name.

Teams that Adopt a New Name

Atlanta      Nightclubs
Charlotte   Bankers
Cleveland   1 Trick Ponies
Dallas      Cigars
Houston           Refineries
LA      Blowhards
LA      2nd Fiddles
Miami      Vice
Milwaukee   Brats
New Jersey   Inconsequentials
Oklahoma   Wind
Portland   Swish
San Francisco    Rock
Utah      Peaks
Washington    Zephyrs (original name)

Let the marketing begin!!!

Feel free to offer more creative or appropriate suggestions.

[Schupac]

Washington has to go back to the Bullets.  That was a good name that was ruined by soccer mom mentality.

I think Houston's name should be the same.  It fits the city (NASA launched a lot of shuttles there).

Dallas, however, should change their name to the "YEE-HAWS!" because that would just be a lot of fun.

[RebusRankin]

I like the names for both LA teams.

[Stu]

The Jazz and Hornets could just trade straight up.  Utah Hornets would actually fit really well, since Utah is "the beehive state" and the beehive is its state symbol.

[Redz]

The Jazz and Hornets could just trade straight up.  Utah Hornets would actually fit really well, since Utah is "the beehive state" and the beehive is its state symbol.

Wow, wouldn't that be something...I'm already confused by Charlotte being the Bobcats and the Sonics being the Thunder who play in the place that the team that used to be in Charlotte played in for a while.

[SShorefan 4.0]

The Jazz and Hornets could just trade straight up.  Utah Hornets would actually fit really well, since Utah is "the beehive state" and the beehive is its state symbol.

A TP for this one!!

[RebusRankin]

Cleveland Rockers

[Big Ticket]

Sacramento Grizzlies?

I propose Sacramento Deficit or Sacramento Terminators

[cdif911]

Utah Flash, that makes sense

[bdm860]

How do Chicago and Toronto keep their names?

Chicago Bulls definitely doesn't fit.  If I'm thinking bulls I'm thinking bull riding and rodeos, that's got to be a Texas team.  Dallas I guess since you're taking Mavericks away. 

Raptors ain't gonna fit with any team.  Toronto Hosers?  Toronto Free Medical Care? Toronto Our Dollar's Now Stronger Than Yours? One of our Canadian bloggers needs to step up on this one.  Toronto RebusRankins?

[SShorefan 4.0]

Raptors ain't gonna fit with any team.  Toronto Hosers?  Toronto Free Medical Care? Toronto Our Dollar's Now Stronger Than Yours? One of our Canadian bloggers needs to step up on this one.  Toronto RebusRankins?

TP!!!

I left Chicago's name due to Jordan (not a great reason, but it's what I was thinking) and Toronto's name because I just couldn't think of anything much better -- but you have!

[davemonsterband]

Washington has to go back to the Bullets.  That was a good name that was ruined by soccer mom mentality.

Well said by the guy with the piece in profile pic, TP.

[SShorefan 4.0]

Washington has to go back to the Bullets.  That was a good name that was ruined by soccer mom mentality.

Well said by the guy with the piece in profile pic, TP.

but the Zephers were the original name -- and it's cooler.

[RebusRankin]

How do Chicago and Toronto keep their names?

Chicago Bulls definitely doesn't fit.  If I'm thinking bulls I'm thinking bull riding and rodeos, that's got to be a Texas team.  Dallas I guess since you're taking Mavericks away. 

Raptors ain't gonna fit with any team.  Toronto Hosers?  Toronto Free Medical Care? Toronto Our Dollar's Now Stronger Than Yours? One of our Canadian bloggers needs to step up on this one.  Toronto RebusRankins?

Much as I like having a team named after me I can't accept because to be honest I don't cheer for them at all.

How about the Toronto "Not the Leafs"? That's the main sports passion in Toronto anyhow. Their slogan could be, "We play in the same building as the Leafs" or "Our tickets cost less."

[greg683x]

If we're gonna call a team the NightClubs, then Miami should get it.  Since Atlanta known more for being hot as hell anyway, we could call them the Heat.

Also, I dont know much about Milwaukee, but I dont get how the whole Bucks thing fits.  They should do something related to beer, like the Brewers in baseball.

Something would need to be done about the Cavs too.  Hmmm.  Unemployment is really high in Ohio.  We could call them the Cleveland Pink Slips.