Please forgive us and our imperfect vessel, Doc Rivers, for daring to contradict your infinite wisdom and power. Please direct your wrath not at Rivers, the Celtics or us poor, ignorant, dirt-covered peasants, but at the league office for having the AUDACITY to think for an instant that it was a higher authority than you and that it had the right to punish one of your shining angels of truth. We will do anything to be spared your vengeance. We will go out and find whatever treacherous infidel at the NBA is responsible for this grave abomination and we will sacrifice him. We will hang him upside down and ceremoniously castrate him and then deliver his genitals to you upon a golden altar... ANYTHING to convince you to have mercy on our beloved Celtics and that well-intentioned but uppity fool Doc Rivers as we embark on our holy playoff quest for the NBA Championship.
In case you haven't figured it out by now, I'm being sarcastic, so let me begin again in earnest.
Dear pig-headed scum,
SHUT UP! Stop whining about being finally held accountable in the teeniest, tiniest of instances after years upon years of being treated as if you are invincible. This may come as an absolute shock to you, but you are NOT above the law. When one of your officials breaks the rules, he must be held accountable and virtually everyone in this country who doesn't wear a whistle and a gray shirt to work feels the same way. How DARE you criticize the league for their justifiable actions against that arrogant punk, Bill Kennedy, after all of the trouble that you have caused and the black eye you have placed on this league. All around the world, sports fans who would otherwise devote their attention and dollars to the NBA refuse to give it a chance because, as THEY say, "the officiating is just too bad." Are you really so convinced of your infallibility? Do you think the NBA fans are tuning in to watch YOU work and not the players? Have you forgotten about Tim Donaghy? This is why refs MUST be held accountable and it's an outrage that it happens so rarely.
And if you even have the slightest notion to blame Doc Rivers for this situation and to take it out on him and the Celtics during the playoffs, just remember: You are not the only ones who are capable of great vengeance and wrath. Celtics fans have already been pushed towards the brink of hunting down your officials like animals because of an endless series of injustices over the last several years. We can only be pushed so far. There are Celtics fans all over the globe and at all levels of government and military. We can swarm upon your homes in the night with torches, bazookas and apache helicopters and hold YOU accountable in ways that the league never would.
LISTEN TO THE MANIAC!!!!!!!!!!
Topic: Dear infallible, all-knowing ref union (Read 3824 times)