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Author Topic: Help saltlover troll the Wizards  (Read 1671 times)

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Help saltlover troll the Wizards
« on: June 14, 2017, 02:56:23 PM »

Offline saltlover

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Having bought a few tickets to Wizards-Celtics games this year as a DC-area resident, I received the following unsolicited e-mail from the Wizards:

Quote
Thank you for joining us during such an exciting season! We capped off our best year since 1979 with 49 regular season wins, our first Southeast Division title, and a thrilling Eastern Conference Semifinals run. 

I’d like to invite you to join the #DCFamily for the upcoming season. We are hosting a special event at Verizon Center on the evening of Thursday, June 22 during the NBA Draft. You’ll be able to place a $100 Partial Plan deposit to guarantee first access to our partial and mini-plans for next season, and an extremely limited number of outstanding DC 12 Club full season seat locations will also be available for the first time.

Verizon Center was an awesome place to be all season long, with a 30-11 regular season home record, and an undefeated 6-0 run at home during the playoffs. I’d love for you to be a part of it again!

Does anyone want to help me craft a snarky reply?
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Re: Help saltlover troll the Wizards
« Reply #1 on: June 14, 2017, 03:00:39 PM »

Offline fairweatherfan

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Off the top of my head, ask them which game they'll be raising the banner for Eastern Conference Semifinals Participant.

Maybe something asking for a good way to pass 51 draft picks' worth of time (they pick 52 bc they traded their 1st for Bogdanovich).
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Re: Help saltlover troll the Wizards
« Reply #2 on: June 14, 2017, 03:03:03 PM »

Offline saltlover

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Quote from: fairweatherfan on June 14, 2017, 03:00:39 PM
Off the top of my head, ask them which game they'll be raising the banner for Eastern Conference Semifinals Participant.

Hah, they're totally raising that banner too. I don't think they'd even get the irony.  Their rafters are a monument to mediocrity.
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Re: Help saltlover troll the Wizards
« Reply #3 on: June 14, 2017, 03:05:54 PM »

Offline fairweatherfan

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Quote from: saltlover on June 14, 2017, 03:03:03 PM
Quote from: fairweatherfan on June 14, 2017, 03:00:39 PM
Off the top of my head, ask them which game they'll be raising the banner for Eastern Conference Semifinals Participant.

Hah, they're totally raising that banner too. I don't think they'd even get the irony.  Their rafters are a monument to mediocrity.

They'll do one for division champs at minimum I'd bet.
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Re: Help saltlover troll the Wizards
« Reply #4 on: June 14, 2017, 03:15:21 PM »

Offline saltlover

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Quote from: fairweatherfan on June 14, 2017, 03:00:39 PM

Maybe something asking for a good way to pass 51 draft picks' worth of time (they pick 52 bc they traded their 1st for Bogdanovich).

Yeah, I'm definitely going to note their lack of a 1st round pick.
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Re: Help saltlover troll the Wizards
« Reply #5 on: June 14, 2017, 03:18:09 PM »

Offline max215

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The last time they won a championship, xyz was happening in the world.
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Re: Help saltlover troll the Wizards
« Reply #6 on: June 14, 2017, 03:20:42 PM »

Offline footey

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Quote from: max215 on June 14, 2017, 03:18:09 PM
The last time they won a championship, xyz was happening in the world.

Jimmy Carter was President.
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Re: Help saltlover troll the Wizards
« Reply #7 on: June 14, 2017, 03:25:49 PM »

Offline Phantom255x

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"Knockout Olynyk" >>>> John Wall

Don't @me or reply back

 :laugh:
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"Tough times never last, but tough people do." - Robert H. Schuller
Re: Help saltlover troll the Wizards
« Reply #8 on: June 14, 2017, 03:29:46 PM »

Offline Future Celtics Owner

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Quote from: fairweatherfan on June 14, 2017, 03:05:54 PM
Quote from: saltlover on June 14, 2017, 03:03:03 PM
Quote from: fairweatherfan on June 14, 2017, 03:00:39 PM
Off the top of my head, ask them which game they'll be raising the banner for Eastern Conference Semifinals Participant.

Hah, they're totally raising that banner too. I don't think they'd even get the irony.  Their rafters are a monument to mediocrity.

They'll do one for division champs at minimum I'd bet.
Write back glorifying the past seasons "achievements" and ask if they have concidered raising a banner to commemorate everything the #DCfamily witnessed?LOL. Write it like you actually mean it though.
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Re: Help saltlover troll the Wizards
« Reply #9 on: June 14, 2017, 03:30:45 PM »

Offline fairweatherfan

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Quote from: Phantom255x on June 14, 2017, 03:25:49 PM
"Knockout Olynyk" >>>> John Wall

Don't @me or reply back

 :laugh:

Haha salt could ask who they're targeting as an Olynyk stopper at 52.  :D
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Re: Help saltlover troll the Wizards
« Reply #10 on: June 14, 2017, 03:35:59 PM »

Offline BitterJim

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Quote from: saltlover on June 14, 2017, 03:15:21 PM
Quote from: fairweatherfan on June 14, 2017, 03:00:39 PM

Maybe something asking for a good way to pass 51 draft picks' worth of time (they pick 52 bc they traded their 1st for Bogdanovich).

Yeah, I'm definitely going to note their lack of a 1st round pick.

Combine that and the snarky banner question

"During which game will the '2017 Eastern Conference Semifinals Runner Up' banner be raised into the rafters? And will that be before or after the Wizards finally make a selection this draft?"
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I'm bitter.
Re: Help saltlover troll the Wizards
« Reply #11 on: June 14, 2017, 03:42:01 PM »

Offline saltlover

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Quote from: BitterJim on June 14, 2017, 03:35:59 PM
Quote from: saltlover on June 14, 2017, 03:15:21 PM
Quote from: fairweatherfan on June 14, 2017, 03:00:39 PM

Maybe something asking for a good way to pass 51 draft picks' worth of time (they pick 52 bc they traded their 1st for Bogdanovich).

Yeah, I'm definitely going to note their lack of a 1st round pick.

Combine that and the snarky banner question

"During which game will the '2017 Eastern Conference Semifinals Runner Up' banner be raised into the rafters? And will that be before or after the Wizards finally make a selection this draft?"

Haha, thanks.
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