My mission to be a great father.

[Chris]

If that is your mission, then I don't doubt that you will turn out to be that great father.

I agree with this. Being a good parent often does come down to desire and effort. If you really want to be a great parent, and put the effort in to be one, then they have a huge leg up.

[ronaldo943]

Ensure that your child is a lifelong Celtics fan.  Mission accomplished.

TP.

[chicagoceltic]

Encourage your children to be who they are, do what want and to chase THEIR dreams not YOUR dreams.  Show your children support and try to be a positive influence.

I was and still am a sports fanatic.  I was an average sized kid but an above average athlete.  Sports was my life growing up.  My 15 yr old son has always been a big boy (he is 6'1", 200 lbs) and is naturally strong.  I tried to get him into sports when he was young but he did not have the natural coordination that I had when I was young and never became interested in sports. He is more mathlete than athlete.  He is interested in animals and science and fishing, things that I wasn't really in to but I learned about and do with him.  He is a wonderful young man and I could not be more proud.

My daughters (11 yr old twins) are more like me and are into sports.  They want to play everything and I have coached them in softball and basketball.   I willl support their interest insports as long as that is what they want to do but i do not want to push them too much.  I see plentyof parents who seem to push and push their kids with sports to the point where the kids do not seem to be having fun any more.

My idea of being a great parent is to love and support your child and pave the way for them to define and achieve their own success.

[CelticnLA]

Just give them time. As much as you can, let work stay at work, sit on the floor with them and watch their shows (as nonsensical as they may be), and be happy coming home to them. My dad was in a band on the side, and some of my favorite memories were sitting on the speakers and watching him and the band play. I don't play an instrument but its rare that I go hoop without my kids being with me. Whatever you are interested in and find joy in your kids will pay attention to. Good luck bro!

[CelticConcourse]

Oh yeah. Good luck with your mission

[celtsfan84]

Encourage your children to be who they are, do what want and to chase THEIR dreams not YOUR dreams.  Show your children support and try to be a positive influence.

I was and still am a sports fanatic.  I was an average sized kid but an above average athlete.  Sports was my life growing up.  My 15 yr old son has always been a big boy (he is 6'1", 200 lbs) and is naturally strong.  I tried to get him into sports when he was young but he did not have the natural coordination that I had when I was young and never became interested in sports. He is more mathlete than athlete.  He is interested in animals and science and fishing, things that I wasn't really in to but I learned about and do with him.  He is a wonderful young man and I could not be more proud.

My daughters (11 yr old twins) are more like me and are into sports.  They want to play everything and I have coached them in softball and basketball.   I willl support their interest insports as long as that is what they want to do but i do not want to push them too much.  I see plentyof parents who seem to push and push their kids with sports to the point where the kids do not seem to be having fun any more.

My idea of being a great parent is to love and support your child and pave the way for them to define and achieve their own success.

This might be the best, most insightful post I've ever read on this forum.  Great post, TP.

[JSD]

Also congrats to you JSD as im guessing your wife is pregnant?

Thanks. My son is 1.5 and he's starting the whole walking and talking thing. I'm a bit crazy so I'm already planning all this stuff to do with him and working on a gameplan of how I'm going to approach different scenarios that can and will come up. There are so many wildly successful people here, I figure why not use this resource?

[GreenFaith1819]

Coming from a single parent home, my mom was really not that strict...her main thing was for me to take care of my brother. I believe I grew up fast during those years, and avoided many of the pitfalls of youth because of my responsibilities at home.

In our neighborhood, we played kickball, baseball, basketball, rode bikes - everything. It was a much simpler time...we did not have many Atari's back then, so for the most part we/my friends spent a lot of time outside.

I also built model cars, played with HO scale trains, collected toys, in my "me" time.

For me, my Faith was/is HUGE...even though I didn't accept Jesus as my personal savior until I was 19, my mom was saved, and my grandmother was saved, so I had a lot of influence in my life even at an early stage.

Good stuff. Sounds like you were in kid in 1960's or 1970's? Did your mother play a role in devloping your "me" hobbies or was it outside influence? Also, who was your father figure (is any)? And if you don't mind asking, what do you do now or before retirement?

I was born in 69...I'm 43 years young.

My mom played a sizeable role in the "me" hobbies...I vividly remember her struggling, but she sacrificed and saw fit to get me both a train set and race track for a few Christmases - thus my love of trains.

She didn't try to restrict my TV time, so I was into a lot of the popular stuff back then...Star Wars was huge, as was Super Friends, Space Ghost...

Didn't really have a strong father figure up until my mid-teens...during my pre-teen years, my uncle did his best, though. He gave me my love for basketball and football.

I served in the U.S. Navy until retirement a few years ago...went to school, and now work at Lowes.

[JSD]

Encourage your children to be who they are, do what want and to chase THEIR dreams not YOUR dreams.  Show your children support and try to be a positive influence.

I was and still am a sports fanatic.  I was an average sized kid but an above average athlete.  Sports was my life growing up.  My 15 yr old son has always been a big boy (he is 6'1", 200 lbs) and is naturally strong.  I tried to get him into sports when he was young but he did not have the natural coordination that I had when I was young and never became interested in sports. He is more mathlete than athlete.  He is interested in animals and science and fishing, things that I wasn't really in to but I learned about and do with him.  He is a wonderful young man and I could not be more proud.

My daughters (11 yr old twins) are more like me and are into sports.  They want to play everything and I have coached them in softball and basketball.   I willl support their interest insports as long as that is what they want to do but i do not want to push them too much.  I see plentyof parents who seem to push and push their kids with sports to the point where the kids do not seem to be having fun any more.

My idea of being a great parent is to love and support your child and pave the way for them to define and achieve their own success.

Great post thanks. Just to clear, I don't care what my son ends up doing as long as he has the drive to be successful doing it. I believe a BIG part of that drive will come with how he is raised.

[ItStaysYang]

Stay alive!

Treat thy as thou would have wished to be treated whilst you were a child.

That is the worst advice I've ever seen. If you don't understand why .... well, you don't understand why because you wrote it to begin with.

[daveh51292]

I get the whole 'let your kids pursue their dreams' and whatnot, but let's be real, I'm glad my parents guided my education and ambitions. Sure, maybe I wanted to be a film writer, or actor when I was a kid, but that would not have ended well, at all. Encourage children to pursue what they're good at, rather than the naive dream that will leave them resentful.

"Don’t follow your passions, follow your effort. It will lead you to your passions and to success, however you define it." -Mark Cuban

http://blogmaverick.com/2012/03/18/dont-follow-your-passion-follow-your-effort/

[chicagoceltic]

Encourage your children to be who they are, do what want and to chase THEIR dreams not YOUR dreams.  Show your children support and try to be a positive influence.

I was and still am a sports fanatic.  I was an average sized kid but an above average athlete.  Sports was my life growing up.  My 15 yr old son has always been a big boy (he is 6'1", 200 lbs) and is naturally strong.  I tried to get him into sports when he was young but he did not have the natural coordination that I had when I was young and never became interested in sports. He is more mathlete than athlete.  He is interested in animals and science and fishing, things that I wasn't really in to but I learned about and do with him.  He is a wonderful young man and I could not be more proud.

My daughters (11 yr old twins) are more like me and are into sports.  They want to play everything and I have coached them in softball and basketball.   I willl support their interest insports as long as that is what they want to do but i do not want to push them too much.  I see plentyof parents who seem to push and push their kids with sports to the point where the kids do not seem to be having fun any more.

My idea of being a great parent is to love and support your child and pave the way for them to define and achieve their own success.

Great post thanks. Just to clear, I don't care what my son ends up doing as long as he has the drive to be successful doing it. I believe a BIG part of that drive will come with how he is raised.

Thank you and you are welcome.  Being a parent is a difficult job.  It is also the most rewarding job anyone could have.  To be great, first and foremost you need to be there and be involved.  Be the good influence.  If you want to bring up your child to have a desire to be great at whatever they want to do you need to show them what commitment is.  Kids learn a lot from just watching their parents.  If they see you half arsing things then they will think that that is ok.  Do what you say you will do and finish what you start.

[GreenFaith1819]

Also - I imagine you've changed a TON of diapers...talked to your child...all that stuff.

By doing that alone, you've already started to mold him into a productive person.

Babies hate soiled diapers, lol.

You will be able to tell him as he grows up about changing his diapers...may seem small, but some don't experience (or choose to experience) that.

Expect to fail at times...when you DO fail, just know that you aren't perfect - they will see that failure, but still love you because of it.

Expect to worry. Life is tough enough, but with a child as long as you persevere with whatever you encounter, they will learn from that, too.

Also - give MUCH love/appreciation to your wife...for me, I think my wife has a huge imprint on both my sons, being that I was gone/at sea a lot during their early years.

Cherish that face time with them.

If you have extended family nearby - grandmothers, grandfathers, etc - let them help, too...that extended family can play a huge role in development.

Don't always "have" to say things to your son...by just making eye contact he is seeing what he will become later in life.

[GreenFaith1819]

Expect to fail at times...when you DO fail, just know that you aren't perfect - they will see that failure, but still love you because of it.

To explain further - I recall placing a TON of pressure on myself with my first son...I wanted so much to do the right things, be perfect, etc - I spent a lot of time worrying...

..."How could I have son, and not even have a father figure in my life growing up?" is what I thought.

Your son will be fine, JSD...I look back at my oldest son NOW, and he is already taking care of his younger brother and has a relationship with him. I thank God for that, because looking back I didn't do half bad with him.

[LB3533]

As best as you can, provide a safe, loving, caring, respectful environment.

Provide a basic, fundamental structure, principles, values, but allow the children freedom to find their own way....if they get lost, you bring them back.