First realize that if you are addicted to drugs or alcohol, the addiction never goes away. Anyone I know who was successful controlling their impulse for either had something more important to them-usually a loved one or family. It is a two way street. The loved one supports them and the addict cares too much to disappoint them. And their are no long term goals. You don't take that drink or that hit in the next 5 minutes. That is all that matters.
As to the social thing, you probably are paying to much attention to the outside world and not yourself. If you do things that make you value yourself, the rest of the world doesn't matter and you can go anywhere and feel comfortable. I have a list of people that I really care about and it matters what they think of me. It is a very small list of good people who have experienced horrible things and know what it is when all choices suck. Those people value me. I had a great love who lived a super tough life and who knew every rotten thing I had ever done and she still called me her hero. She died in my arms from cancer. However I will never have an addiction for the simple reason I would never disappoint her. So whenever I go into any situation, the opinion of the group doesn't matter. No matter how horrible the situation, I still know I was valued by some who mattered.
Analyze yourself and be totally honest which is what AA is trying to do. We are all saints and devils. You focus on the saint part but you are aware of the devil and you keep him under control when you see him start to arise.
