Ah cathartic thread for me. My experience parallels that of the OP, and the murky inconsistency of the reffing more often than not overshadows my ability to enjoy the games. I have at points tried to eschew the NBA entirely, but I love basketball too much and its almost impossible at this point for me to not check Celticsblog every time I open a browser, something I started doing in 2002-3 (though I rarely post). Lately, I've expressly tried not to care. To view the games a spectacle and entertainment, a diversion having no bearing on my life or well-being. But that of course, runs counter to the experience and state of fandom, and trying to watch basketball this way seems almost like trying to suffocate my love for it. Which proves impossible for me to do ultimately.
So where does that leave me? In this bind where the game I love to watch is degraded under the stewardship of a regime that either blatantly disregards the alienating effects of poor officiating, refuses to think of creative means to address it, or worst of all, perhaps has fiscal incentives to engender such game management.
Last point I'll make here is that for those who think talk of such series-extending referee schemes are for quacks and paranoid fans, I have no real retort. But I can also point to a growing body of academic literature chronicling bias in officiating, and to this topic, interested parties should consult the paper published in December 2009 by economists John Price, Marc Remer, & Daniel Stone titled "Sub-Perfect Game: Profitable Biases of NBA referees."