I don't think Danny 'Got into their heads', I think Danny took a shot at Lebron and Pat backed up his guy.
Pick your battles. Riley didn't take his own advice and worry about his own team either by responding. Ainge did not say anything that was not true. Why so defensive? Must be because Riley is afraid officials might actually tighten up on calling fouls against Lebron as unlikely as that scenario is.
I think you're overthinking it. Here is what happened:
Pat Riley: Danny Ainge said what? Screw that guy! He should shut the fudge up and worry about his own team! More hair gel!
(Assistant scurries and comes back)
Pat Riley: Pomade? Pomade?? But Im a Dapper Dan man! I'm hungry, more dead puppies!! And someone tell Danny Ainge I said screw that guy!