Yes I will be less upset because the person wasn't breaking the law. They weren't intentionally doing something that they knew had a very high probability of resulting in an accident and likely a deadly one. Intent is a very big difference and you know it. Even if you don't want to admit it...
I'll agree that drunk driving is against the law while the other things I listed aren't. I've never said otherwise. But I think you're completely wrong about whether they intentionally did doing something that they knew had a very high probability of resulting in an accident. You seem to be saying that legality determines intent. They're two separate issues. If you hadn't slept for 2 nights and then you got behind the wheel are you saying that you don't know that your condidion increases your risk?
You have no data whatsoever that can show that the effects of being "old" or the effects of being tired is as detrimental to the ability to control their vehicles as someone being drunk. Sure I would like to have a test for the elderly to make sure that they have the physical ability to drive. Sure I would like to see stricter requirements on truck drivers. Here is a stat though for you. Only about 5600 people are killed by sleepy truckers vs. over 17,000 people due to drunk drivers. That is 3x as many people and is due to illegal activity. Statistics also show that drivers under 30 are much more likely to be in an accident than the elderly. That BTW is also not illegal.
Do you have any data at all that shows that the effects of being just at (not over) the legal BAC limit is
as detrimental to the ability to control their vehicles as someone who is old or tired? Two can play that game. And I can't believe that you don't see sleepy truckers as an issue since "only" a third as many people are killed. You trotted out that stat like it was 5-10 people a year, not 5600.
And out of those 17000 people who were killed by drunk drivers, how many of them were killed by people who were either at or just over the legal limit? Every time I hear about a drunk driving homicide on the radio I hear terms like "twice the legal limit". I'll hazard a guess that the number of people killed by drivers who are barely over the legal limit is well below the number of people who are killed by sleepy drivers. In other words, a number too small to concern you.
Also if you go back to my earlier post I listed being an inexperienced driver as being a hazardous situation, just like being elderly and driving, so if you're concerned that "drivers under 30 are much more likely to be in an accident than the elderly", just change my example from "killed by an 85 year old" to "killed by a new driver". The result will obviously be the same: you won't be concerned because it's not against the law.
If you think that it's not a problem that people "endanger your children's lives" as long as the detrimental behavior that they are engaging in isn't illegal, more power to you.