Author Topic: KD with yet another social media blunder  (Read 10985 times)

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Re: KD with yet another social media blunder
« Reply #30 on: March 31, 2021, 12:52:01 PM »

Offline celticsclay

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How is commenting on his skin color ok? There should be no double standards if we're to take this seriously.

I agree that it is a bad look and it is not okay, but I don't have a problem with there being a double standard. Might as well have straight pride parades and white history month based on your reasoning. Minority groups are inherently at the behest of the majority.
that isn't the same thing.  Celebrating one's heritage, religion, skin color, etc. is no where near the same thing as making fun of someone for their heritage, religion, skin color, etc.  Not even close to the same thing.

No, it's not the same thing, and it may not have been the best comparison for me to use, but I was just trying to point out how making fun of somebody because they are white does not have the same impact as making fun of them for being [insert minority description here]. Since we live in a society controlled by straight, white, christian males; insulting somebody for being any of those things is pretty useless since they are in the ruling class. I realize I am still very privileged even if I am not all of those things.

I should note that I absolutely don't think it's okay to say what KD said about white people, but I am not going to treat it the same way as if it were Rapaport insulting KD's ethnicity.

I am a bit confused why people are focusing on the pasty/pale aspect of this which would maybe get you a warning in an office job and not the graphic homosexual things he said which would get you fired from almost any job for saying to someone.

Re: KD with yet another social media blunder
« Reply #31 on: March 31, 2021, 01:02:03 PM »

Offline Donoghus

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How is commenting on his skin color ok? There should be no double standards if we're to take this seriously.

I agree that it is a bad look and it is not okay, but I don't have a problem with there being a double standard. Might as well have straight pride parades and white history month based on your reasoning. Minority groups are inherently at the behest of the majority.
that isn't the same thing.  Celebrating one's heritage, religion, skin color, etc. is no where near the same thing as making fun of someone for their heritage, religion, skin color, etc.  Not even close to the same thing.

No, it's not the same thing, and it may not have been the best comparison for me to use, but I was just trying to point out how making fun of somebody because they are white does not have the same impact as making fun of them for being [insert minority description here]. Since we live in a society controlled by straight, white, christian males; insulting somebody for being any of those things is pretty useless since they are in the ruling class. I realize I am still very privileged even if I am not all of those things.

I should note that I absolutely don't think it's okay to say what KD said about white people, but I am not going to treat it the same way as if it were Rapaport insulting KD's ethnicity.

I am a bit confused why people are focusing on the pasty/pale aspect of this which would maybe get you a warning in an office job and not the graphic homosexual things he said which would get you fired from almost any job for saying to someone.

Because people want to scream double standard.

The homophobic stuff is way worse than the pale comment. It's not even close. The rightful outrage really should be on that end of things.


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Re: KD with yet another social media blunder
« Reply #32 on: March 31, 2021, 01:02:52 PM »

Online Roy H.

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How is commenting on his skin color ok? There should be no double standards if we're to take this seriously.

I agree that it is a bad look and it is not okay, but I don't have a problem with there being a double standard. Might as well have straight pride parades and white history month based on your reasoning. Minority groups are inherently at the behest of the majority.
that isn't the same thing.  Celebrating one's heritage, religion, skin color, etc. is no where near the same thing as making fun of someone for their heritage, religion, skin color, etc.  Not even close to the same thing.

No, it's not the same thing, and it may not have been the best comparison for me to use, but I was just trying to point out how making fun of somebody because they are white does not have the same impact as making fun of them for being [insert minority description here]. Since we live in a society controlled by straight, white, christian males; insulting somebody for being any of those things is pretty useless since they are in the ruling class. I realize I am still very privileged even if I am not all of those things.

I should note that I absolutely don't think it's okay to say what KD said about white people, but I am not going to treat it the same way as if it were Rapaport insulting KD's ethnicity.

I get what you are saying. I also get why people object to it. It seems like we have a hierarchy of groups that can be made fun of.

First, to be clear, this is a tangent. I don’t want it to take away from the vulgarness and prejudice in KD’s words.  I also don’t want this to be seen as definitive, or some thing that I am strongly invested in. It’s just my own observation.

All that said, it seems like blacks stand on top of the social justice ladder.  Perhaps women in general come next, with difference given to black women. Next are LGBT people.  Then, it gets tricky.  Hispanics qualify for social justice only in certain circumstances.  Generally, they’re “brown” people.  However, if they commit a crime against somebody higher on the social justice latter, all of a sudden they find themselves as a “white Hispanic”.  Sorry, George Zimmerman, you’re no longer a minority if you kill a black person. That makes you white.

Even lower on the social justice ladder than Hispanics? Asians. Well, until recently, that is. In this exact moment, political points can be scored standing up to violence against Asians, so they are moving on up the ladder.  But, for the last 200 years? Not so much. Asians have historically been victims of racism and oppression, whether it be Chinese railroad workers or Japanese in interred during WWII to Koreans and Southeast Asians discriminated against due to foreign wars.  And yet, despite this oppressions, Asians are still discriminated against, and that’s completely legal.  Asians are kept out of top universities for no reason other than their race.

Admittedly, I don’t know where Native Americans fall in.  The fact that an NFL team used a racial slur nickname for decades says they probably don’t rate highly. 

You would think that straight white Christian males are at the very bottom of the pyramid.  But, on average, my guess is that Jewish folks rate even lower regarding social justice.  Why?  Because anti-semitism is acceptable among too many of those at the top of the ladder, as well as by those at the mid- to bottom.

And, this is why the entire thing sucks. None of this is about equality. It’s about who has the largest list of grievances, who has the loudest voice, and who has the allies to amplify that voice. I am hoping that at some point in my lifetime the Supreme Court will end this nonsense, at least in terms of hiring and college admissions.

But, again, this is a tangent.  Regardless of hell double standards are defined, KD’s words are homophobic and gross.


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Re: KD with yet another social media blunder
« Reply #33 on: March 31, 2021, 01:18:18 PM »

Offline jambr380

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How is commenting on his skin color ok? There should be no double standards if we're to take this seriously.

I agree that it is a bad look and it is not okay, but I don't have a problem with there being a double standard. Might as well have straight pride parades and white history month based on your reasoning. Minority groups are inherently at the behest of the majority.
that isn't the same thing.  Celebrating one's heritage, religion, skin color, etc. is no where near the same thing as making fun of someone for their heritage, religion, skin color, etc.  Not even close to the same thing.

No, it's not the same thing, and it may not have been the best comparison for me to use, but I was just trying to point out how making fun of somebody because they are white does not have the same impact as making fun of them for being [insert minority description here]. Since we live in a society controlled by straight, white, christian males; insulting somebody for being any of those things is pretty useless since they are in the ruling class. I realize I am still very privileged even if I am not all of those things.

I should note that I absolutely don't think it's okay to say what KD said about white people, but I am not going to treat it the same way as if it were Rapaport insulting KD's ethnicity.

I am a bit confused why people are focusing on the pasty/pale aspect of this which would maybe get you a warning in an office job and not the graphic homosexual things he said which would get you fired from almost any job for saying to someone.

Because people want to scream double standard.

The homophobic stuff is way worse than the pale comment. It's not even close. The rightful outrage really should be on that end of things.

My first comment in the thread was about the gay comments; but I also didn't want to start lecturing people since I am gay and I didn't want to come off as 'too offended'. I was also just responding to erik - whose comment focused on the white aspect - so I just wanted to comment on that, as well.

Fwiw, I do think Durant's comments fall more into the extremely ignorant category rather than pure homophobic. If Rapaport were gay, this would be a totally different story; but Durant was just doing what is mostly acceptable amongst peers...and that is likely the bigger problem here.

Re: KD with yet another social media blunder
« Reply #34 on: March 31, 2021, 01:20:13 PM »

Online Roy H.

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It’s interesting, as another tangent, about how some words take on different meanings than their origin.  This is similar to the conversation we had with gift in the Meyers Leonard thread.

Two of the swear phrases I grew up with were [rooster]sucker and son of a [prostitute].  On their face, they are homophobic and misogynistic. Yet, I truly believe but that wasn’t really the intent when used. Hell, go watch deadwood and see the casual Ness and which certain words are used. I don’t think the implication is that the recipient of the insults are actually gay.  I think that we have seen a similar evolution of phrases like “that’s gay” or “don’t be retarded”.  They started out as an insult directed at a specific group of people, then that got expanded to a general insult that lost its original meaning, and finally the phrase became taboo again when society stopped and paid attention to what was actually being said.

How does that apply to Durant? I’m not sure. I suspect that some people who use phrases like that are not in fact homophobic misogynist. They were just taught growing up that hurling statements like that is a way of attacking another man’s pride and manhood.  But, actually reading those DMs, I would lean more towards actual homophobia in this case.


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Re: KD with yet another social media blunder
« Reply #35 on: March 31, 2021, 01:49:09 PM »

Offline nickagneta

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How is commenting on his skin color ok? There should be no double standards if we're to take this seriously.

I agree that it is a bad look and it is not okay, but I don't have a problem with there being a double standard. Might as well have straight pride parades and white history month based on your reasoning. Minority groups are inherently at the behest of the majority.
that isn't the same thing.  Celebrating one's heritage, religion, skin color, etc. is no where near the same thing as making fun of someone for their heritage, religion, skin color, etc.  Not even close to the same thing.

No, it's not the same thing, and it may not have been the best comparison for me to use, but I was just trying to point out how making fun of somebody because they are white does not have the same impact as making fun of them for being [insert minority description here]. Since we live in a society controlled by straight, white, christian males; insulting somebody for being any of those things is pretty useless since they are in the ruling class. I realize I am still very privileged even if I am not all of those things.

I should note that I absolutely don't think it's okay to say what KD said about white people, but I am not going to treat it the same way as if it were Rapaport insulting KD's ethnicity.
While I understand your point regarding the difference between a white person making fun of people of color(POC) for their skin tone being worse than POC making fun of whites for being white, I don't agree with it. I think any people making fun of any other people's skin color is wrong.

But, given the context of this nation's history for white people and people of color, especially blacks, I get it's perceived that whites making fun of POC for their skin tone is way worse than POC making fun of white people's skin color. I get that and think white people shouldn't be all that offended by it. But I just don't think it right.

I remember this time some years back where my friends, who are black, took my ex and I to a club in Roxbury, MA, a black section of Boston for those that don't know. My ex and I were the only two white people in the place. While dancing, a couple came up to us and said we were great dancers...for white people.

We laughed and I bought them drinks after and became friends. I still text the guy and keep in touch with them. Now obviously, the "for white people" is genuinely racist, but I never took it that way. And I am glad I didn't because my new friends were not close to being racist and if I had taken it that way, I wouldn't have had the honor of befriending two great people and sharing great times with then over the years.

Re: KD with yet another social media blunder
« Reply #36 on: March 31, 2021, 02:34:15 PM »

Offline gift

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From a human perspective, it's weird that we are seemingly fine with one person insulting another as long as they insult that person using acceptable language so as not to be insulting to a construct of society within which that person might fit.

Re: KD with yet another social media blunder
« Reply #37 on: March 31, 2021, 03:04:41 PM »

Offline PhoSita

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Is anyone surprised when KD shows to be a terrible person anymore?


No, although it makes it easier to understand how and why Kyrie, KD, and Harden all grouped up on the same team.


Hey, anybody else remember when there were stories about how KD was the new Tim Duncan?  The quiet, humble superstar committed to the team?  OKC was the new Spurs and KD was their Tim Duncan.

Looks pretty funny in retrospect, in multiple ways.
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Re: KD with yet another social media blunder
« Reply #38 on: March 31, 2021, 03:44:07 PM »

Offline greg683x

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How is commenting on his skin color ok? There should be no double standards if we're to take this seriously.

I agree that it is a bad look and it is not okay, but I don't have a problem with there being a double standard. Might as well have straight pride parades and white history month based on your reasoning. Minority groups are inherently at the behest of the majority.
that isn't the same thing.  Celebrating one's heritage, religion, skin color, etc. is no where near the same thing as making fun of someone for their heritage, religion, skin color, etc.  Not even close to the same thing.

No, it's not the same thing, and it may not have been the best comparison for me to use, but I was just trying to point out how making fun of somebody because they are white does not have the same impact as making fun of them for being [insert minority description here]. Since we live in a society controlled by straight, white, christian males; insulting somebody for being any of those things is pretty useless since they are in the ruling class. I realize I am still very privileged even if I am not all of those things.

I should note that I absolutely don't think it's okay to say what KD said about white people, but I am not going to treat it the same way as if it were Rapaport insulting KD's ethnicity.
While I understand your point regarding the difference between a white person making fun of people of color(POC) for their skin tone being worse than POC making fun of whites for being white, I don't agree with it. I think any people making fun of any other people's skin color is wrong.

But, given the context of this nation's history for white people and people of color, especially blacks, I get it's perceived that whites making fun of POC for their skin tone is way worse than POC making fun of white people's skin color. I get that and think white people shouldn't be all that offended by it. But I just don't think it right.

I remember this time some years back where my friends, who are black, took my ex and I to a club in Roxbury, MA, a black section of Boston for those that don't know. My ex and I were the only two white people in the place. While dancing, a couple came up to us and said we were great dancers...for white people.

We laughed and I bought them drinks after and became friends. I still text the guy and keep in touch with them. Now obviously, the "for white people" is genuinely racist, but I never took it that way. And I am glad I didn't because my new friends were not close to being racist and if I had taken it that way, I wouldn't have had the honor of befriending two great people and sharing great times with then over the years.


With all due respect, I have a hard time relating your story to what KD said.

yes, both circumstances have racist comments, but the situations are completely different.  One is a light hearted complement using a racial stereotype and the other is a personal attack with the sole intention of humiliating a person bc of the appearance of their skin.

Are either ok?  No, but the fact that one is being deliberately offensive makes a huge difference
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Re: KD with yet another social media blunder
« Reply #39 on: March 31, 2021, 03:56:02 PM »

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Are either ok?

I wish that we could be OK as a society with the lighthearted, well intended jokes, even if they play on stereotypes. We obviously are in some instances: Nobody really bats an eye at Irish being portrayed as drunks or hot-tempered.  Nor should they, in my opinion.

White folks can’t dance?  I think it’s harmless. 

I think that where we lost our way as a society was when we started ignoring intent and just started labeling things as verboten.


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Re: KD with yet another social media blunder
« Reply #40 on: March 31, 2021, 04:14:06 PM »

Offline nickagneta

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Are either ok?

I wish that we could be OK as a society with the lighthearted, well intended jokes, even if they play on stereotypes. We obviously are in some instances: Nobody really bats an eye at Irish being portrayed as drunks or hot-tempered.  Nor should they, in my opinion.

White folks can’t dance?  I think it’s harmless. 

I think that where we lost our way as a society was when we started ignoring intent and just started labeling things as verboten.
Thanks, Roy. That was my point.

By having "for a ______(fill in the blank) person" in any conversation or comment, that conversation or comment is inherently racist, bigoted, homophobic, mysogynistic, whatever.

But intent matters, as does who is being discussed. For the most part, I think white people should have a lot thicker skin regarding such comments and judge the intent much harder before jumping to the reverse racism comment conclusion.

I could have taken the comment by a total stranger as an insult, me being one of only two white individuals in the club. But, I didn't. I saw the intent. So no big deal.

Re: KD with yet another social media blunder
« Reply #41 on: March 31, 2021, 04:17:40 PM »

Offline Erik

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How is commenting on his skin color ok? There should be no double standards if we're to take this seriously.

I agree that it is a bad look and it is not okay, but I don't have a problem with there being a double standard. Might as well have straight pride parades and white history month based on your reasoning. Minority groups are inherently at the behest of the majority.
that isn't the same thing.  Celebrating one's heritage, religion, skin color, etc. is no where near the same thing as making fun of someone for their heritage, religion, skin color, etc.  Not even close to the same thing.

No, it's not the same thing, and it may not have been the best comparison for me to use, but I was just trying to point out how making fun of somebody because they are white does not have the same impact as making fun of them for being [insert minority description here]. Since we live in a society controlled by straight, white, christian males; insulting somebody for being any of those things is pretty useless since they are in the ruling class. I realize I am still very privileged even if I am not all of those things.

I should note that I absolutely don't think it's okay to say what KD said about white people, but I am not going to treat it the same way as if it were Rapaport insulting KD's ethnicity.

I am a bit confused why people are focusing on the pasty/pale aspect of this which would maybe get you a warning in an office job and not the graphic homosexual things he said which would get you fired from almost any job for saying to someone.

Because people want to scream double standard.

The homophobic stuff is way worse than the pale comment. It's not even close. The rightful outrage really should be on that end of things.

Who is people ?

I read through the first page and a half and didn't see much talk about it so I was confused why it's acceptable.

I would have brought up the homophobic part if we focused on the skin color part.

Re: KD with yet another social media blunder
« Reply #42 on: March 31, 2021, 04:18:22 PM »

Offline PhoSita

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Are either ok?

I wish that we could be OK as a society with the lighthearted, well intended jokes, even if they play on stereotypes. We obviously are in some instances: Nobody really bats an eye at Irish being portrayed as drunks or hot-tempered.  Nor should they, in my opinion.

White folks can’t dance?  I think it’s harmless. 

I think that where we lost our way as a society was when we started ignoring intent and just started labeling things as verboten.


I think it's tricky because it's way too easy for people to be callous or ignorant and claim that they "didn't mean any offense" when they do or say things that are genuinely harmful or upsetting to others.  "I was just joking and you can't prove otherwise!"  That basically undermines any attempt to hold people accountable for the consequences of their actions.

At the same time, I think it can easily get taken way too far when people with an activist / pushing-the-envelope mindset completely disregard any argument about what somebody intended.  Many are really happy to completely write off / cancel / ostracize somebody without spending any time considering where that person was coming from.  The attitude is something like "Well there are too many privileged people in positions of power as it is, so I don't mind being quick to dismiss any of them that do something wrong, regardless of the circumstances or intent."


I think what people on the left too often overlook is that if you create a dynamic where admitting that you've done something wrong results in such an extreme burden to be forgiven -- i.e. no mitigating circumstances, simply saying sorry isn't enough, you're disqualified from coveted positions, etc -- nobody will want to actually admit wrong, apologize, or seek forgiveness.
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Re: KD with yet another social media blunder
« Reply #43 on: April 01, 2021, 08:43:07 PM »

Online Roy H.

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Here's tonight's apology:

Quote
KD on the Rapoport flap: “I sorry that people saw that language I used.” #Nets
– via Twitter NYPost_Lewis

I love apologies like this.  At least they're sincere.  "I'm sorry I got caught doing that thing that you think is bad, but that I'm 100% comfortable with.  I'm going to keep doing it, but I'll try harder not to get caught next time."


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Re: KD with yet another social media blunder
« Reply #44 on: April 01, 2021, 09:10:20 PM »

Offline jambr380

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Here's tonight's apology:

Quote
KD on the Rapoport flap: “I sorry that people saw that language I used.” #Nets
– via Twitter NYPost_Lewis

I love apologies like this.  At least they're sincere.  "I'm sorry I got caught doing that thing that you think is bad, but that I'm 100% comfortable with.  I'm going to keep doing it, but I'll try harder not to get caught next time."

Well, seeing how his initial apology was this:

Me and mike talk CRAZIER than this on the regular and today he’s p---ed....My bad mike, [dang]!!

I don't think we can really be surprised. I think one of the biggest things people look for when somebody gets caught doing something they shouldn't is contrition. This 'apology' should anger a lot of people and I hope the NBA doesn't look the other way. What Leonard said was awful, but at least he made sure to put a proper apology out there. That's just par for the course.