I got rid of Facebook. When will you?

[TradeProposalDude]

There is a lot to say about facebook. I got into it my freshman year in college five years ago. As of two days ago, I elected to finally dump it. I sent an e-mail to privacy@facebook.com. I recently got an e-mail saying that the process to permanently delete was underway and will be finished in no more than 14 days.

It was not a tough decision. It was rather an overdue move that was the result of an impulsive decision. I could have left facebook much earlier, as I was aware of the terrible effect it was having on my psyche not long after joining it. But my delay was due to my addiction to facebook. During my time as a member, I wanted to stay aboard in the event I missed something if I left (i.e. an unexpected friend or family member of mine joining facebook). Or an opportunity to post a photo album down the road which may lead to lots of comments and subsequent "fame" amongst the facebook community. The latter motivation seems a bit out there, but is inevitably a factor into why many people seem to stay on facebook. Facebook is, after all, a popularity contest.

I was the type of facebooker that created a status every day or two. I am aware that a healthy medium may have been reached with some thoughtfulness, like many achieve, where use is far more seldom. This method still allows for remaining in contact with friends without the need to be in everyone's faces all the time in their newsfeeds. But, my personality is that - I thrive off of getting peoples' attention. I don't mean this in a bad way. I used to write about many different things which resulted in, mainly, the same types of people responding. I almost felt like I needed to live up to the image I was creating for others to banter with. While I did not lie or embellish my outside life to my facebook friends, I did feel an obligation to the people who kept responding (often family) and those whom I had some meaningful friendship with in the outside world to prolong my communication with them in the event that if I seemed too aloof they'd drop me as a friend. I am not terrified by the prospect of being unfriended, but I am not the type who likes to burn bridges either, especially if it's avoidable.

At the end of the day, these extremely trivial fears caused me to become overwhelmed with friends, friends' lives, and the overall culture that defines facebook. Why did I spend days - weeks - maybe even months of my life on facebook? I really don't think I got anything beneficial out of it. I say the people who "get" facebook use it as merely a supplement to a flourishing social life instead of as a substitute. I have people who I regularly communicate with outside of facebook, so I am not removed from actual social interaction. But it did become a means to shoot the **** to an extent where I became concerned about people and lives that otherwise had no effect on me.

Once again, as a disclaimer, I know there are smarter people than me who know how to use facebook properly. But does anyone else feel detested with the culture of facebook? How it has the power to eat away at your sanity because of people and comments that promote gossip and negativity rather than what they should be promoting? Anyone feel me on this? Part of my dismay may also be the effect of the types of people I'm connected to.

[Redz]

Haven't experienced that side of Facebook, but I'm a wee bit older than you, so I'm generally communicating with older people as well.

My major gripe with Facebook is some privacy issues, but you need to know those before getting involved.

[wdleehi]

I haven't had that issue. 


Farmville updates from friends made me think about leaving. 

[Kiorrik]

I have no issues with Facebook myself, but that is mostly because I know what the deal is, how it works & why it does what it does.

Having worked as a consultant for a web design agency, I know how important things like Facebook, Twitter, etc are to the crowd, and I know of the many ways to use it. As for myself; I don't like the whole popularity thing, since it also comes with certain "expectations". You're expected to reply to people, to their updates, their messages, and say things when photo's, stories, etc are posted. Quite frankly; I just don't have the time for all of that.

When I'm online; I read. I'm a lurker. Occasionally I'll find places where it's actually worth my time to post - like here on CB- but in general, I tend to stay in the background.

Thus, I use it as a way to communicate with people. I'll generally set my privacy settings to hidden, as well as any possible chat-related functions. I don't want to be seen, I want to pick my own time to chat to people.

So no, I'm not like you in that way, TPD I tend to "not care" too much.

As for the privacy stuff with Facebook; I've got nothing to hide, so anyone can see what they want to see, and if they want to fine-tune displayed adds to my likes and dislikes, in my opinion, that's just fine. I'd rather look at adds for computer games and basketball gear than medication and finance anyway.

The bit about selling my information to third parties is a bit less cool, but I make sure I fill out as little information as I can, or use email-addresses which pretty rigorous filter settings so that I don't receive any spam.

The internet isn't a dangerous place, if you don't stick any vital information in it.

[guava_wrench]

Isn't social interaction as meaningful as most of what we do in life?

So long as it doesn't cause you to neglect other responsibilities.

[Mike-Dub]

I had to get it because I went far away for school.  It is extremely addicting.

[Kiorrik]

I haven't had that issue. 


Farmville updates from friends made me think about leaving. 

Ah yeh, I dabbled in Farmville because my girlfriend did it. I made a farm with some acres with crops in the shape of a Super Mario figure once. After that, I lost all interest.

I have no time for stuff like that anyway

[Kiorrik]

Isn't social interaction as meaningful as most of what we do in life?

So long as it doesn't cause you to neglect other responsibilities.

I met my current girlfriend through online social activities, so yeah, I would say it's about the same thing.

[BballTim]

  I signed up for facebook at the request of a friend who, I think, wanted to share some videos or pictures he took. So I did a small amount of setting up my account and spent a few hours checking out people from my high school who were on it. I put in a friend request for the friend of mine who asked me to join and he didn't respond to it (not really surprising, btw). I haven't logged in since although I get the occasional message that someone requested to be my friend.

[TradeProposalDude]

Isn't social interaction as meaningful as most of what we do in life?

So long as it doesn't cause you to neglect other responsibilities.

That is precisely the problem with facebook though. It may not necessarily be so addictive that your responsibilities are neglected, but it can be a distraction nevertheless. Even in these two days of having been permanently removed from facebook, my mind is just at so much more ease. It is a subtle shift in behavior that causes one to get addicted to facebook - but it is tough to get out of the trap once you're hooked. The only reprieve was to quit altogether.

As for Kiorrik - don't you feel strange even being an onlooker, despite lack of physical contribution on facebook? It doesn't solve the problem of becoming preoccupied with lives and livelihoods that should be of no concern to you. But then again, I can't speak for you... or your mental strength. I am just speaking for myself. But having spoken to many about the site, I know there are people in my boat.

[WeMadeIt17]

I was on facebook for a little while but I am 20 now and cant stand it I have been off of it for a year now. I just couldn't stand people complaining about having to pull another all nighter to study. Just annoyed me, I am close with a few people I can share text or hey pick up the phone and go see them rather then talk of the internet.

[wdleehi]

I haven't had that issue. 


Farmville updates from friends made me think about leaving. 

Ah yeh, I dabbled in Farmville because my girlfriend did it. I made a farm with some acres with crops in the shape of a Super Mario figure once. After that, I lost all interest.

I have no time for stuff like that anyway

So that's what it looks like.

[bruinsandceltics]

I got rid of it early. Two years ago during my freshman year of college. It was getting out of hand so I decided that it was time to stop using this [dang] thing.

Best decision of my college career thus far.

[ImShakHeIsShaq]

I was on facebook for a little while but I am 20 now and cant stand it I have been off of it for a year now. I just couldn't stand people complaining about having to pull another all nighter to study. Just annoyed me, I am close with a few people I can share text or hey pick up the phone and go see them rather then talk of the internet.

You probably need to stop texting too, I hear that the younger Chinese generations can't remember how to write their own language anymore (caused by texting too much)! I bet soon We will have similar problems (we are already bad now) with spelling and such!

[greg683x]

tradeproposaldude - you're not a freak, I'm addicted too.  Though all the popularity stuff youre talking about isnt really the same on my end.  It's just the constant need to see what everybodys doing.

None the less though, youre not the only one who has been addicted here, and there are plenty of people out there who have been also.

To be honest, my addiction with myspace was much worse and I did what you did a couple years ago.  Just deleted it and was done.