I'm always a little surprised when I see Game of Thrones/ASOIAF referred to as "boy fiction." I get that a lot of the content panders to the male crowd, but I personally know more female fans of the series than male. And, as a girl myself, I have to give Martin props for writing a good range of female characters with complex psychologies. They each represent different methods of coping with or subverting gender roles in their society, present some interesting foils (Catelyn and Cersei), and I will champion Sansa until the end of my days as the only Stark who has an inkling about how the Game is played. The perception that fantasy is for boys unless written by a woman is just wrong--Martin's legions of female readers will attest to that.
As for Martin-Tolkien comparisons, I think it's more accurate to say that Martin's brand of fantasy is a reaction against the Tolkinian. He takes all of the tropes that Tolkien made famous and deliberately turns them on their head. That's why this series was so refreshing to the genre as a whole. There have been so many Tolkien imitations and ripoffs (Terry Brooks, I'm glaring in your direction), and what Martin did was toss the accepted fantasy model out the window and write a drama that questions whether those standard, romantic tropes could ever be sustainable in a setting that operates closer to our reality.
The two authors take such divergent approaches that they're hardly even comparable, at least for me. The only thing they have in common is the genre and the substantial page count.