Everyday my Dad texts me from the TJ Maxx parking lot

[ChillyWilly]

My elderly father texts me everyday around 5:30. Conversations are always the same. Him telling me he's bored and we chat about random things from our days. Sometimes he'll tell me he's waiting in the car while my step-mother is in TJ Maxx.

However I noticed he's mentioned this several days in a row so I asked if he's really sitting in the car waiting on her at TJ Maxx. He said yes she goes there everyday. Why is she going to TJ Maxx everyday to shop? Oh she rarely comes out with anything she likes helping folding the clothes and putting this back in order after people pick through things. She doesn't work there. He likes the quietness of sitting in the car watching people in the parking lot.

I'm not sure why I shared this but found it pretty funny.

[Neurotic Guy]

My elderly father texts me everyday around 5:30. Conversations are always the same. Him telling me he's bored and we chat about random things from our days. Sometimes he'll tell me he's waiting in the car while my step-mother is in TJ Maxx.

However I noticed he's mentioned this several days in a row so I asked if he's really sitting in the car waiting on her at TJ Maxx. He said yes she goes there everyday. Why is she going to TJ Maxx everyday to shop? Oh she rarely comes out with anything she likes helping folding the clothes and putting this back in order after people pick through things. She doesn't work there. He likes the quietness of sitting in the car watching people in the parking lot.

I'm not sure why I shared this but found it pretty funny.

Nice story.  As a nearly elderly guy (not sure if people consider 65 nearly elderly)… I can relate to enjoying the solitude. My wife is away caring for her very elderly parents and I’m home tonight planning my dinner and thinking about what edgy movie I might watch (one I’m sure she’d hate).  Simple pleasures, but no TJ Maxx. My best to your dad -I  think I’ll call my daughters - - due for an annoying ring from dad.

[ChillyWilly]

my parents are approaching their 90s

[smokeablount]

I thought there was a dark twist coming, glad it ended light hearted.

[rocknrollforyoursoul]

My Dad recently turned 80 and I've talked with him every day since my Mom died six years ago, and though he's fairly active, we do pretty much what you and your Dad do: tell each other about the day we had. It's a quiet but precious thing.

[Goldstar88]

My Dad recently turned 80 and I've talked with him every day since my Mom died six years ago, and though he's fairly active, we do pretty much what you and your Dad do: tell each other about the day we had. It's a quiet but precious thing.

 It’s really nice to hear that you talk to your dad everyday. Life is too short.

[Surferdad]

I am lucky to still have both parents, they are 98 years old and in poor health. I live 3+ hours away but I try to visit every week or so.

My dad is in a rehab facility and his only connection to the outside world (other than TV) is his cell phone. He calls me almost every day. We don't chat long but it helps him stay 'relevant' to the life he once knew.

I find your story to be endearing. Thank-you for posting.

[Neurotic Guy]

I am lucky to still have both parents, they are 98 years old and in poor health. I live 3+ hours away but I try to visit every week or so.

My dad is in a rehab facility and his only connection to the outside world (other than TV) is his cell phone. He calls me almost every day. We don't chat long but it helps him stay 'relevant' to the life he once knew.

I find your story to be endearing. Thank-you for posting.

Wonderful that your parents have had long lives, at the same time growing old is so difficult. My dad passed 30 years ago at 70 and though he was vibrant at the time and too young to go, the plus (I guess) is he never endured what my mom did over the last 10+ years of her life. For too many elderly, the last phase of life is filled with sadness, loneliness, humiliation, discomfort.
 At this moment, my wife is in upstate NY caring for her mid-80’s parents - mom who is declining mentally and dad who has had multiple strokes and is deteriorating by the day.  Hard to witness. 

It’s a little emotional for me to hear the stories of you all staying connected to your elderly parents - providing them with a bright moment in their day.  These small things are sometimes the most important. Best to all of you and your parents.

[rocknrollforyoursoul]

My Dad recently turned 80 and I've talked with him every day since my Mom died six years ago, and though he's fairly active, we do pretty much what you and your Dad do: tell each other about the day we had. It's a quiet but precious thing.

 It’s really nice to hear that you talk to your dad everyday. Life is too short.

It is. And the older I get, the shorter (and faster) it seems. It's great to hear about others who are staying in touch with their parents and helping them—if you guys are like me, your parents did so much for you, sacrificed so much, and deserve the best.

[hwangjini_1]

the ages of the posters here would seem to bracket my own. as for the OP, enjoy your time with your dad and mom, regardless of way they contact you. if you dad likes sitting in a car, great! what sort of things did he put up with when you were younger? 

also, if there is anything you want to say to either parent, do so now. because once they pass away, there is never a chance to do so, ever.

[Neurotic Guy]

the ages of the posters here would seem to bracket my own. as for the OP, enjoy your time with your dad and mom, regardless of way they contact you. if you dad likes sitting in a car, great! what sort of things did he put up with when you were younger? 

also, if there is anything you want to say to either parent, do so now. because once they pass away, there is never a chance to do so, ever.

It’s interesting. I was able to be with/ care for my dad in the final weeks of his life. I told him I love him and all that.  Truth be told, we spent 35 years not getting along very well - and I hate to say this - but once he started on morphine, we got along quite well.

 I said what I had to say but if I’m being completely honest I would have liked him to have owned his part for some of the challenges we had.  Our parents’ end of life isn’t just our chance to say what we want/need to say - but it’s their chance too. The only way to give them that chance is to be present.

[hwangjini_1]

the ages of the posters here would seem to bracket my own. as for the OP, enjoy your time with your dad and mom, regardless of way they contact you. if you dad likes sitting in a car, great! what sort of things did he put up with when you were younger? 

also, if there is anything you want to say to either parent, do so now. because once they pass away, there is never a chance to do so, ever.

It’s interesting. I was able to be with/ care for my dad in the final weeks of his life. I told him I love him and all that.  Truth be told, we spent 35 years not getting along very well - and I hate to say this - but once he started on morphine, we got along quite well.

 I said what I had to say but if I’m being completely honest I would have liked him to have owned his part for some of the challenges we had.  Our parents’ end of life isn’t just our chance to say what we want/need to say - but it’s their chance too. The only way to give them that chance is to be present.

well said, thanks for saying it. i think our fathers were very similar on many levels.

[Kernewek]

This is a really great thread to see at the moment - we have both of my parents staying with us for a little while after not seeing them for a fairly long time, and even though we have a very good relationship I'll be very happy for them to once again be thousands of miles away - as it's a good reminder to look on the bright side of our familial relationships if we have the luxury to.

[Celtics2021]

the ages of the posters here would seem to bracket my own. as for the OP, enjoy your time with your dad and mom, regardless of way they contact you. if you dad likes sitting in a car, great! what sort of things did he put up with when you were younger? 

also, if there is anything you want to say to either parent, do so now. because once they pass away, there is never a chance to do so, ever.

It’s interesting. I was able to be with/ care for my dad in the final weeks of his life. I told him I love him and all that.  Truth be told, we spent 35 years not getting along very well - and I hate to say this - but once he started on morphine, we got along quite well.

 I said what I had to say but if I’m being completely honest I would have liked him to have owned his part for some of the challenges we had.  Our parents’ end of life isn’t just our chance to say what we want/need to say - but it’s their chance too. The only way to give them that chance is to be present.

My father died in June.  I chose to stay away in his final days, as I had the prior 20 years.  I don’t regret it.

I’m happy for all those who have strong relationships with their parents, or were able to reach reconciliation at the end.  But that is not true for all, and if someone needs to not be there, they probably have plenty of good reason.

[rocknrollforyoursoul]

the ages of the posters here would seem to bracket my own. as for the OP, enjoy your time with your dad and mom, regardless of way they contact you. if you dad likes sitting in a car, great! what sort of things did he put up with when you were younger? 

also, if there is anything you want to say to either parent, do so now. because once they pass away, there is never a chance to do so, ever.

It’s interesting. I was able to be with/ care for my dad in the final weeks of his life. I told him I love him and all that.  Truth be told, we spent 35 years not getting along very well - and I hate to say this - but once he started on morphine, we got along quite well.

 I said what I had to say but if I’m being completely honest I would have liked him to have owned his part for some of the challenges we had.  Our parents’ end of life isn’t just our chance to say what we want/need to say - but it’s their chance too. The only way to give them that chance is to be present.

My father died in June.  I chose to stay away in his final days, as I had the prior 20 years.  I don’t regret it.

I’m happy for all those who have strong relationships with their parents, or were able to reach reconciliation at the end.  But that is not true for all, and if someone needs to not be there, they probably have plenty of good reason.

I'm sorry for your loss, and I'm sorry for whatever circumstances kept you guys apart.